


Lottie Quinn is a Little Confused

by Dr_Mini_Me



Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types
Genre: Alec is a bad kind of possessive, All the time, Consent Issues, F/M, Get it?, Identity Issues, Memory Manipulation gift, Mostly that its like daddy porn, Oh also, POV First Person, She can erase, Shes a little bit of a head case, The Author Regrets Everything, Vampire/Human Hybrid, because her ability is all in her head., change, found not created, get ready for a shitstorm, hah, im hilarious., implant, or delete memories completely, to me anyways
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-19
Updated: 2016-11-10
Packaged: 2018-06-03 04:20:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 14
Words: 28,900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6596461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dr_Mini_Me/pseuds/Dr_Mini_Me
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lottie had an identity once, things she liked or disliked. She had a family when she was girl in Ireland, people to love and people to care for her. Come around 1910, Lottie Quinn lost that and was subjected to her own special ability's downfall. She can't always tell which memories are hers, which aren't, and which ones shes erased from her own mind.  She could use a rock of some kind...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So Lottie is irish, shes actually called Charlotte but hey, memory has been erased for obviously horrifying reasons.   
> Anyways! Because she is Irish, theres going to be some translations at the beginning of each chapter.   
> Also I'm still not sure if its going to be a Carlisle/OC. If you have someone that youd think she'd match up with, tell me ;-----; 
> 
> pull your socks up: get to work
> 
> Jaysus: Jesus
> 
> Shook up: worried
> 
> Ma/Da: Mother/Father
> 
> Gimps: Idiots
> 
> Brasser: Prostitute

I wasn't always like this. Hungry, angry, and destructive. I had a life once. I had a home. Once. I was a person with hopes and dreams and real feelings. I was Miss Lottie Quinn...I was going to be married to my childhood sweetheart, Ralph against my parent's wishes. I can't remember their names anymore, I just remember that my ma was a real Irish woman. Fiery redheaded pull your socks up kind of woman. My da, if I had one, he wasn't all that memorable I guess. I remember that I was going to join The Irish Women's Franchise League. It'd been set up two years ago, I think.

I just remember Ralph...he was a grand man. I went to find him first after everything happened. I don't even know why, I was pretty much gone in the head when I came busting through his door. I knocked and the bloody flimsy thing shattered. That was really when I realised something else was happening here.

I wasn't...normal per se. But the lust hadn't hit me yet. I was still okay then. It was honestly just surprising that no one in Dublin heard his screams.

"Jaysus, Lottie." Ralph exclaimed, shaking his head at me and the door.

He let me in easily enough, I followed him through till the end of the hall and stopped. Something caught my attention out of the corner of my eye. I looked over and there I was. Red curls all amiss, pale as ever, but my eyes were funny. They were still round and bug eyed as ever but the brown was gone, I had red eyes. Red as me own hair.

"Ralphie...I think somethings gone a terrible sort of wrong." I whispered, a little frightened as I looked back at him. I wanted him to say that nothing was wrong, it was all fine and well as usual.

"I'd say so. You've been gone for nearly 4 days, Lottie. Yur ma came banging on my door looking for ya. I was shook up. You look awful, luv." His accent smeared the words together in my ears making me even more nervous.

I looked down at my skirts and found that they were a little worse for wear. The under layers, were practically gone and the black on the top looked...funny. There was brown dots spattered across them. I took in a breath in an attempt to calm down, that was honestly where I went wrong. I couldn't remember what happened. It was scary. This was scary, my throat felt like it was burning.

"Ralphie..." I mumbled as I felt my legs move together until I was pressed against his front. Honestly, to this day I can't remember how I didn't understand what was coming next.

"Lottie...My Ma's home." His voice sounded constricted. Nervous even. I paused as I listened to his ma humming in her bedroom. It sounded like she was ironing. She was a nanny of sorts for some gimps in the higher up society, I guessed she was doing the children's clothes or something.

"Oh yah. Best we go outside then." I nodded to myself quickly, taking his hand and pulling him over the splintered door and out onto the street.

"Lottie...You're hurting me." He sounded more nervous as I nodded again, I was erratic as I yanked him along to outside the city limits. His heart was rapidly pumping, I could smell the fear in his sweat. It really only made my throat hurt even more.

"Sorry." I mumbled lowly, looking at the way my brooch glinted in the moonlight. He'd given it to me, my Ralphie. I'd loved it. It was a sign we were getting married. I was trying to distract myself. I wanted to hurt him so badly and I didn't even really realise it until I heard his screaming.

I froze in my movements, the taste of a sweet juice of sorts on my tongue and in my throat was clear, it was still flowing even. I looked down and found I'd sunk teeth into his chest. Like I'd been burned, I released him and let him drop to the ground. He was still for the most part, staring up at me with amount of terror.

"What have I done?" I whispered to myself as I clapped my hands over my mouth as I knelt down next to him. I'd murdered my fiancé. Oh my god. I'm a murderer. Suddenly, he grabbed at my top. It ripped as I yelped and jumped up. His hand clenched in waves, like his whole body was shaking. Like a frog in boiling water. I turned and ran to my ma. I was only 19. I didn't understand the world or it's workings or what I was. I thought I was still me.

I left and ran as quickly as I could. I had to stay away from people. I had to stay away from my family.

* * *

Honestly, looking back on the memory 10 years later I think I erased it from my mind from the pure horror at what I'd done. I wanted to forget and so, I did. I was able to erase other's memories and it seemed that my first subject was my own mind. Even now I get head pains if I think back to it in depth. I'm good at that, not remembering.

I spent most of my time in the outskirts of the cities for the first five years then I became a stowaway on some ship. I just sneaked on with no idea where it was headed or what it contained. Luckily, it was merely a transport ship to the mainlands of the rest of Europe. Full of bloody furniture and not the good kind, the creaky unseemly sort.

It docked and I slipped out and over into the water quickly, attempting to remain unseen by any passerby. When I stepped onto the pier, I was greeted by a Spaniard. I think. I looked at him, he was pale but had a slightly darker pallor than I ever did.

"Evening, mister." I nodded robotically, trying to not breath until I was out of the cities limits. I looked up to find I couldn't read the bloody signs here. The letters were all funny lookin'.

"Miss." He greeted softly. I paused for a second as I listened to his lack of heartbeat and looked back at him. He had brown hair and red eyes. He was like me.

"You...yer like me!" I grinned at that. I wasn't all that odd after all.

"I'm Eleazar." He slowly nodded taking in my appearance. I was wearing the clothes I'd found in a bin, the shawl helped me cover my head while the dress was just incredibly loose. It seemed like it was meant for a child gauging by the flowery patterns, a girl at that. At 5 foot 3, apparently I fit into the category.

"Lottie." I nodded to him.

"I have a proposition for you, madam." His accent came through giving away his origin. I'd already given mine away easy. His words made me pause for a second before a bit of fury erupted over my face.

"I'm not a bloody brasser." I hissed.

"A what?" He looked confused as his brow furrowed.

"A **hoor**." My accent was quite strong when I got mad, apparently.

"Oh no! Madame, you misunderstood me. I have a job for you. It is very respectable, I assure you." He walked quickly to me. I realised around that time that there weren't any humans in the general area to see his speed.

"And what is it then?" I raised a brow as I pulled my wet shawl from around my hair.

"A new life." He smiled.

Eleazar was a sweet fella. Gentle and understanding when I asked silly questions as we traveled to Italy. He told me of a group called the Volturi, a government of sorts for our kind. There were quite a bit of us apparently. I'd just not met any of 'em, I guess. He said I could be of great use to them and they would in turn give me a home, clean clothes, and sustenance.

* * *

We arrived in Volterra, Italy a fortnight after we'd begun. Apparently I wound up landing in Denmark, it definitely explained why I couldn't read any of the damn signs. When I asked how the heck he found me climbing up on the pier he explained that many of us hitched rides across the ocean like that, so he'd often wait to see what climbed up essentially.

It was pretty here. The streets were cobble stone and lit by lanterns as we went towards a little set of doors with a sign over it displaying a skull and crossbones. I guess it was to keep out whoever they wanted out? I dunno. I was just trying not to breath, Eleazar said I couldn't kill in the area whatsoever and right now my instincts were going wild. I was starving.

I was led by Eleazar through dark wet tunnels and caverns, all winding together as I memorised it all back to the entrance we'd come from. He stopped in front of a pair of doors and spoke quickly in another language to a blonde girl. She looked young but also quite deadly. She nodded, looking back at me and pushed the large black wooden doors open with bare effort.

"Ah! Lottie Quinn, I presume. I am Aro." I was greeted almost immediately by a long black haired man. He sounded eerily cheery as he came closer to me from his throne, he stood at 5'10" tall and having almost translucent skin I was a wee bit thrown off by the man. I glanced around to see the lines of vampires below the thrones watching us with stoic faces like stone soldiers waiting to move like chess pieces. I heard the door's close behind me with a great booming noise.

He held out a hand while bowing his head, I raised a brow as I placed my hand softly in his. All at once I was hit with memories...so many of them all. I'd never dealt with something like this and nearly ripped my hand out of his with the overwhelming sensations. I could feel and see and hear what each person thought in every memory as it raced through my mind.

They weren't all him, there were a few of his but he'd had some sort of ability that allowed him to take the memories. A female's stuck out, she was his sister of some kind and he'd killed her in cold blood. He didn't want someone to know, a boyish looking man with black hair and a softer face. It was during a battle of some kind, I could hear the sounds of bloodshed in the background of the memory.

"Oh my. How enticing. I hadn't remembered her in a millennia." Aro half smiled, showing one canine as he let go of my hand. I took in a deep breath to try and some how steady myself.

"Well what is she then?" I looked behind him for the speaker as he turned and walked back towards the thrones containing one with white shoulder length hair and a sour expression as he looked at me. The other throne contained a much younger looking vampire. The first two appeared to be middle aged but this one was closer to my age as I took in his black hair and paper-like skin.

"She has the abilities to both erase and force the other to relive certain memories, dear brother." Aro answered the sour blond. The blond rolled his eyes at that. I stood awkwardly in the center of the room, feeling the eyes of all their stone soldiers burying themselves into my back.

"Very promising, I'd say. Wouldn't you say so, Marcus?" Aro nodded and looked over towards the black haired man who shrugged apathetically and sighed.

"Well, Miss Quinn. How would you like to join my guard? We may be able to practice on your skills. This would be your home and you would eat here with us. Your job would be to help uphold the laws of our world." Aro motioned to the surrounding chamber walls and doors leading off to goodness knows where. I paused for a second as I nodded slowly. I had little other choice, even if the guy was a bit of odd ball.

"Spettacolare." Aro clapped as he spoke the foreign word with a toothy grin. It gave me all sorts of bad shivers.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Howya: Greetings

"Why've we come here again?" I asked as we trudged through the streets of a colonial city I think called Wisconsin? Maybe that was just the area. Who the feck knows anyways? It'd been 5 years since I joined the guard and I'd found that the more time I spent there, the more I felt the need to stay. It was the oddest sensation but it was really only when I walked into the throne room.

I'd developed my abilities farther than I once could, now I was able to both insert false memories into one's mind as well as erase memories but...I could only do via touch. Aro often had me training on the humans that Heidi brought in but forced me to wear gloves when greeting him.

These days oddly enough, I kept hearing whispers. Just in the very back of my mind. Whispers of doubt and confusion about whether or not there was actually more in the world than this underground coven. I forced them down and away when I came into Aro's presence out of pure terror he'd execute me the same way he had Marcus's wife, Didyme.

"To greet one of master's old friends." Jane announced. I sighed and looked around at Demetri as he stopped every few feet and sniffed the air then scurried about.

"If its one of his friends, why doesn't he just come along?" I asked curiously, walking beside her.

"The masters don't leave unless its a large issue." Jane stated plainly. I nodded, quiet for a few seconds before my next question.

"But if this is a friend, why not?" I asked as I looked down at the cobblestone in the streets. Ireland had streets like these...well they did in the cities. In bogtrottin' area, there were only dirt roads.

"You seem to question the master a lot. I wouldn't do that if I were you. Remember your place." I looked up at her tone to find she was glaring hard at me with some annoyance. I already knew Jane didn't like me, she'd practically screamed it into my head.

Every once in a while Aro would have me go through the entire guard to learn of their activities and replay them all back to him. I'd even done it to Caius and Marcus...Marcus was sad or empty most of the time. His head was filled to the brink with someone else's emotions. Every time he'd try to think, it was pushed down and out.

"Yeah yeah. Whatever." I rolled my eyes as Demetri stopped and knocked on an older house. I just realised that we'd turned off the main road and onto dirt. A bronze haired teenager opened the door, but his eyes weren't like mine. Not at all. They were a coppery yellowish colour. Interesting.

"Can I help you?" He raised a brow as he looked around at us.

"Quinn." Jane raised a brow in annoyance as she waited for me to touch him. I guess she didn't know this vampire.

"Oh right. Howya? I'm Lottie Quinn." I slipped off my glove and wrapped my hand around his, freezing for a second. He was like Aro but instead of separate times, it was like everything flowed together from the past until now. he was actively reading the minds of those around me. I could hear my own thoughts like an echo through time.

"Well? Is he here?" Jane asked impatiently as I searched through his mind. He'd been sick, recently changed but he didn't prey on humans...no. He preyed on animals? What the hell?

"I can just tell you that Carlisle is in the living room. You really don't need to have your Irish bloodhound over here search through everything." He raised a brow as he motioned behind him. I quickly let go of his hand, almost grateful. That was a fucking ride from hell.

"Quinn?" Jane looked back at me in case he wasn't telling the truth. I nodded.

"Hes a mind reader that one." I jerked a thumb over my shoulder as I faced her and pulled on a glove then another.

"Oh Hello Jane, Demetri." A deeper, accented voice greeted. It sounded as wise as Aro's but much gentler, kind even. I turned around to face the man and ended up facing his chest. Well then. Hes a tall fella.

"Lottie Quinn." I greeted as I took a step back. He looked almost British but also very much not. It was hard to place him, I kept wanting to take a glove off and touch his cheek. It looked soft and warm almost...maybe it was just his eyes. He had the warm inviting eyes. I didn't mind him watching me, it felt like I was protected from all angles. It was a new feeling and I may have even enjoyed it a little bit.

"Carlisle Cullen. Does Lottie perhaps stand for Charlotte?" He took my hand and placed a chaste kiss on the third knuckle. I hadn't seen anything like it ever in my years. I almost forgot to respond. He was starting to become more and more attractive. I kept wanting to touch him.

"I...don't know. Or I guess I can't remember." I shrugged as he slowly released my hand. It sounded familiar but it burned me to think of it.

"Lottie is still beautiful." His eyes were on me as he spoke, kind and gentle as ever. Awwwwe.

"Would you like to come in?" He asked as he motioned to the inside of a well lit home. The colours were warm and comforting, a grand bit of difference to the stone walls of Volterra.

"Sure- Ah! I mean no. No we can't." I took a step forward as I felt Jane's gift start to burn my back and neck and stopped. I gave her a dirty look as she raised a brow at my defiance.

"Then is there a reason you're here with your little memory manipulator, Jane?" The boy spoke, gaining both my attention and annoyance. I guess someone told him. Oh well.

"The masters, Aro, Caius and, Marcus would like to invite you to join them once more in Volterra." Jane bent her head with some respect as she spoke to Carlisle.

"I'm...afraid I'll have to decline." He frowned pleasantly. The man was beautiful to look at...as odd as that felt to say.

"Fair enough. Aro and the lot of them can do just f-" I spoke casually with a small smile as I gave into the urge and put a hand on his bicep. Halfway through, I felt Jane's gift smack into my back again. This time with nothing held back. The world blazed into nothing but fire that reminded me of something else long ago. Something that I think I'd forgotten.

"Enough!" I could hear the words bellowed over the burns as I looked up at Carlisle's chest yet again. How did this happen? I looked around as I realized I was being craddled by a set of arms. I was on the ground. His skin was soft. I thought about my father, a pastor and vampire hunter. How it felt to have to disappoint him when I'd been turned. Loneliness. Centuries of loneliness. I wished for a mate and it seemed I might have found one after centuries of waiting. Centuries? I was born in 1891. It was only 1920.

I backed away quickly as I realised the thoughts I'd gotten weren't mine. He was still crouched but stood slowly, his eyes were mechanically checking my frame. He was definitely a doctor, I could tell from the memories of a white coat. This sort of thing had happened once before. I knew after they were his memories. His father, a pastor, a mother's death in childbirth. He'd hidden out in a cellar of some kind. It was personal information I'd just absorbed without even meaning too.

"I'm...so sorry." I shook my head as I turned and zipped off in a random direction. I ran, yet again from a man. I had a overwhelming habit of it, apparently but this time I felt an overwhelming amount of guilt. A minute to an hour later, Jane and Demetri came 'round again. We walked in silence until we came back to docking port. It would take us back to Italy. Jane didn't speak about what had just happened, and nor did I.

* * *

"My Lord." I bowed my head as we returned. Jane and Demetri did the same to greet Aro.

"So he would not come, eh?" Aro sighed with a small smile as he took a few steps closer to us.

"My dear, if you would." He nodded to Jane who in turn placed her hand into his.

"Oh. I see!" He clapped his hands together, he had the same odd little smile he had when he found a new way of object of interest.

"You may go, Lottie." He waved his hand at me as I bowed and left out the side door. I took a few steps as I closed the door and jumped, putting a hand over my heart as Alec appeared. The other, more sane, half of Jane.

"Jaysus, Alec." I took in a few deep breaths as his stoicism creased ever so slightly into a half smile.

"You ought to know when I'm coming with your mind tricks and all that, Lottie." He fell into step with me as I continued walking. Alec wasn't quite as tall as I and I felt that he'd fancied me at times. Well fancied me for more than a good shag or two.

"You ought to know that this is going to piss your sister off." I reprimanded as he slowly wrapped a hand around my dangling one. I didn't have it in me to say no anymore. I used to when Jane turned her gift on me for looking in his direction but these days it was either her burning me alive or him snuffing out my senses. I found his the scarier of the two.

"She can deal with it." He shrugged as he looked down at the joined hands. It felt odd to hold his hand, like I was holding a little brothers hand to walk him to school almost. Alec was only 13 when he was changed, nearly a thousand and hundred years later, he sometimes held the same level of maturity.

"Right." I rolled my eyes at his statement as we came to my chambers. He sort of just invited himself in most of the time. I'd locked the doors at first but I think that Aro or Caius or someone gave him a key. He was definitely higher up on the ladder than I would ever be simply because my gift relied on touch.

"How was the trip?" He asked softly trailing kisses over my shoulder and neck.

"Fine." I felt numb to it at this point. At one point he'd attempted to mark me and it just didn't stick, the pain was awful as an after effect. A throbbing welt resided on my neck for a month, his venom was particularly potent apparently and it dissolved into a crescent scar with no remaining effects. However it did leave the rest of the guard with little to no doubt as to who'd attempted to stake a claim and enough hatred for Jane to bubble over whenever she felt it necessary to show me I was still the bottom rung.

"Are you sure? You smell...odd." He paused a he got to my hair. I'd taken it out of the braids and pins, letting it free fall on the boat. The red curls only really came to right below my shoulders.

"I'm sure." I pushed him away roughly, moving to go into the bathroom mirror and wash my face. He caught my arm and yanked me back, glaring.

"Tell me the truth, Lottie. What happened?" His mouth was set in a hard line as his grip tightened. I began to feel the fear set in as I realised I could see less and less. He was using his ability. Damn it, the fear dissolved into absolutely nothing.

"I forgot my place and Jane set me right." I answered robotically in what sounded like a whisper as my hearing went blank.

"I see. All's well then." He smiled his version of one, a corner half pulled up. Many times people thought Alec was the kinder out of the twins. They were wrong. Every move was calculated and well planned, he wasn't erratic emotionally, but he did attack when he felt a slip in his prey's guard.

I took off my dark grey cloak and sat it on the chair next to my bed, accepting my fate. This happened nearly every time I spent more than a week away from him, at first I contested. Coming to Aro to have the older man tell him off...But when the vampire merely congratulated the boy on finding his mate I lost hope. It was this or I would be punished by Alec for hurting his feelings or some other nonsense.

I laid down on the bed and felt him rip first through my corset and then the shirt. I'd have to look at getting a new one of those some time soon. He broke each one of them but refused to have me dress any other way. Sometimes I felt betrayed by this coven of cultish bastards but other times, I hadn't been lied too. I was clothed, fed, and housed all at the price of my cold dead body. It was a fair trade as I closed my eyes and held my breath when his lips thrashed into mine.


	3. Chapter 3

"Aro has called for us to join him in the throne room, Charlotte." Alec stood in the door way, looking expectantly at me in the bed. Sometimes I just felt like laying here for as long as I possibly could. I had no reason to move outside of Aro or a blood lust, Alec could move me if he felt it necessary.

I'd found that there was nothing else in the world for me except this bed, my duties, and blood since we came back from the New World 10 years ago. My mind and body was empty of my own desires and filled to the brink with the entire coven's dirty secrets and whispers in the night. It was particularly difficult to think around Chelsea which I felt had something to do with her gift. I wasn't allowed to search through her memories.

"Of course." I nodded, moving slowly. Alec had tried to mark me again last week. It left me with less mobility as it didn't take yet again. Aro informed him that repetition was key when he showed the older vampire the would be mark.

I turned away from Alec to pull on the cloak after I tied up the corset again. This one was black with red lines to line the whale bone inside it on the outside, Alec's pick of course. It was a favourite of his. He hadn't destroyed it yet. I felt like I was stuck in 1895 with the clothing choices. Sometimes I wondered what the trends were in Dublin these days when I felt particularly frivolous. Alec would rather that I stuck to English terms and trends, Lottie was too Irish for him. So he'd chosen Charlotte.

He led me down the hall with precision and grace. I followed, detached from the mildewy walls and echos. He seemed to speed up a bit and so in turn, as did I. He opened the door going first and expecting me to close it. I followed in step as I shut the door and came to stand next to him, just a foot away with my hands folded across my front.

"Carlisle...I trust you've met the newer addition to my guard. This is Charlotte Quinn." A high voice sounded off near me with a throat clearing to direct me to greet the man.

"I have." I looked up in to the familiar eyes and bowed my head in greeting. He smiled warmly, I did not return it out of self preservation. I didn't want to anger Alec or Jane. Instead I looked back at the ground in front of me. A pair of shiny shoes stepped into my vision, forcing me to look up as Aro took my gloved hand.

"Charlotte...Perhaps it would be best if you showed Carlisle to his room. Maybe even give him a tour, hm?" He raised one brow to show I had no choice while maintaining the light tone. He was trying to put on a good show for the other vampire. I realised I was here to convince him to stay but I wondered where the redheaded boy was, from before.

"Of course, my lord." I bowed my head as my acceptance of the terms. I did not look at Alec or anyone else as I motioned to the door I was now holding open.

"Sir. This way." I kept my head bowed and shoulders just shy of hunching as he paused by me. Alec hated it when my shoulders hunched forward.

"Please, ladies first." He smelled of cinnamon and cloves. It reminded me of a Christmas with my family, long ago. I could still smell the scent of it all and orange...it bit at my nose when I inhaled. I was 11, I knew it was me this time because Ralph's family was over.

I stared at him for a second as I resurfaced from the memory to see if he really meant it. I'm sure I looked a bit gone in the head just staring at this god of a man. He just smiled back, no lie was evident across his features. Just worry. I wondered what he could possibly be worried about as I nodded, accepting his terms. I walked past him into the hallway and he closed the door behind us.

"You've changed, Charlotte." Carlisle mentioned plainly as we walked.

"Have I?" I glanced at him to see him frowning, his brows knitted together in thought.

"You were...happier. Vibrant. Alive." He nodded as he explained. I paused in my steps for a second as I processed it. It'd never really occurred to me that I had changed, I always felt like my only loyalty was to the coven. I had no need to think of anything past that.

"If you say so, sir." I bowed my head again and looked at the stone walkway. I was stopped as he took my hand, I looked at my black gloved hand covered by his larger pale one.

"Carlisle. Call me Carlisle." He didn't really order me like Alec or Jane or Aro did...he was asking. I tilted my head as I peered at him. That was bloody odd to me not to mention out of order

"Are you quite sure?" I raised a brow as I watched him break into a smile. The real kind where you get little crinkles under your eyes. I hadn't seen any thing like it for ages. It was fascinating.

"I am." His voice came out in a lower voice as I reached forward slowly and ran a finger along the lines out of curiousity. He didn't stop me. They seemed to deepen as I touched them, it left the tips of my fingers almost tingling in the most pleasant of ways.

"You...have wrinkles, Carlisle." I felt my head tilt even more as I leaned closer to look at them, he seemed to allow this almost leaning towards me. Alec never had those lines. I think he was too young when he was changed to ever have the skin wrinkle. Sometimes when he touched my skin, I'd relive his stake burning. Hear every wish he had that it would all end and he wouldn't feel anything anymore. He was always angry with me when it happened.

"Its because I'm smiling. You've made me happy." His voice was patient with my curiousity. I nodded and turned to continue walking, I'd gotten my answer. When we came to his room I opened the door, and motioned for him to go in.

"I'll see you tomorrow?" He asked not moving forward. I raised a brow at the question.

"If I do not have any duties to attend too, perhaps." I acquiesced as I bowed my head to him.

"You really don't have to do that. I feel that we're equals if nothing else, Charlotte." He determined.

"You're a guest of Aro's. We're not and we probably will never be. Good day, sir. " I spoke formally as I took a last bow and left him there, choosing to return to my room down the hall from his. That was all Aro's doing and I knew it. I didn't understand why the vampire was so determined to have Carlisle join. I pulled the sheets over my head as I curled into a ball.

The man had me losing some of the stable feelings of nothing I'd been using for the past decade. Instead of nothing I was hit with waves of nostalgia for my old life, a nice home with love and warmth. I was rebellious in my youth. I disappointed my mother. I should have treated her better instead of getting engaged behind her back.

He had me craving for a soft hug or a warm kiss. Something that was purely affectionate and soft and kind. My nose crinkled as I felt the regular waves of dry sobs wrack my body. It continued on until Alec came in sometime during the night. If he noticed I'd been emotional, he didn't mention it.

"Above the sheets, Charlotte." Alec ordered. I gave no reaction of having heard him. I didn't want to listen to his stupid commands any more. I wanted out of this hellhole of a cult.

"Charlotte." He growled forcing me into motion of my own accord. If I didn't I'd lose my vision and hearing next but I still didn't say anything as I shifted. He wrapped my hair around his fist and pulled slightly to see his mark.

"Seems we'll have to try again in a month or two. I do wonder why it's not taking whatsoever though" He sighed and released my hair. I moved back to my side of the bed, away from him. I knew exactly why it wasn't taking. He _wasn't_ my mate. I knew it deep in my heart but I would never say it out of pure fear of the repercussions. Alec could burn me and get away with it, I wasn't nearly as important as he was in the hierarchy.

"Come here. I just want to hold you tonight." He demanded sullenly as he wrapped an arm around my stomach and pulled me back to him. He stroked my hair as we laid there for the remainder of the night until he left. I think he'd already spoken to Aro and knew what I was going to have to do to Carlisle. I think it left him with a sour taste in his mouth because he slammed the door shut when he left, locking it. 

After he did, I pulled the sheets back over my head and tried to hum to myself. There was a song my ma used to sing to me that I only remembered parts of. I couldn't remember it anymore, the words left me. I think it'd been in Gaelic but I wasn't all that sure. 


	4. Chapter 4

I'd gotten dressed, lacking the cloak this time, when there was a knock on my door. It wasn't Alec, that was for damn sure. He'd barge on in whether or not I was okay with it.

"Come in." I turned from the mirror and called to them. The door opened hesitantly, revealing the blonde man from yesterday. I felt a grimace appear as I took him in, turning to put on the cloak as quickly as I could. I wanted it to shield Alec's attempt at a mark from him. For some reason it felt wrong to let him see it. I didn't spend much time to thinking about it.

"You look lovely." He grinned at me. The compliment gave me a wave of warm fuzzy somethings in the bottom of my stomach, rendering me unable to do anything but nod at him.

"I'm on me-my. I'm on _my_ way to the Throne Room. " I explained as I went past him, catching my slang and improper English before I could be punished for it.

"You know...I actually like your accent quite a bit." He confessed after a moment of trailing behind me. His own turned a slight English before leveling out to the accent I'd come to know as 'American'.

"It's illiterate." I detested with little emotion in my voice as I pushed the door open.

"Its beautiful." His voice was lower this time, the sounds of humans in the center of the room drowning out our discussion. I tried to force his words out of my head. I had to hold on to the emptiness to keep above the surface.

"Ah! Lovely! Charlotte, you're just in time for the main course and you've brought Carlisle. How are you finding it dear friend?" Aro greeted, friendly as he kissed my hand quickly and switching his focus to the blonde vampire. I turned to watch the exchange.

"I think I'm putting the pieces together. Faster than I expected, actually." He nodded to Aro with a small smile. He still had the crinkles but they were minuscule.

"Wonderful news! How would you like to join us for lunch?" Aro invited. I took in Carlisle's expression of sudden distaste as he politely declined with some curiosity.

"Thank you but I think not. I'll check outside the limits for something." He held a hand up as he nodded to the crowd. It just occurred to me that his eyes were the colour of wheat, I wasn't sure how I didn't realise it before. He must be drinking something else if not human, but...I didn't understand what. Sure, the experience was a little on the depressing side especially for me when I got smacked with a happy memory from when they were 3. But what else could we eat?

"Of course. Charlotte will show you the way out." Aro nodded as he smiled awkwardly. He didn't understand the reasoning either. I snapped into action at the mention of my name and nodded. Motioning to the large set of doors at the far end of the throne room. Carlisle followed me pleasantly, taking slower steps than I was.

"What do you eat?" I asked after a few passages were winding together. The question had been gnawing at me for a while.

"Animals. I drink the blood of Animals. I'm a doctor, it wouldn't do to kill my patients after I help them." He explained goodnaturedly.

I thought over it. I couldn't read the memories of animals...or at least not that I know of. I don't think they had the same intensity in their minds as humans or vampires. Human memories were more chaotic, emotionally driven, and displaced. New born vampires were a tad clearer than a human, driven by bloodlust, but a mature vampire's memories were well put together and often crystal clear. Every emotion was appropriate to the situation.

"...C-could I try it with you one day, maybe?" I asked softly in a mousy voice as I glanced over at Carlisle. Aro would never have tolerated the idea of one of his guard's eating the same time as him or even the same meals. He was given the freshest, younger blood first.

"I'd love for you to try it with me, Charlotte." His face blossomed into a grin as he nodded quickly.

"Lottie." I wanted him to call me by my real name. The one I'd identified with for ages before Alec and the Volturi.

"I'd love for you to try it with me, Lottie." He seemed to almost hug the name as he spoke it with immediate acceptance. I felt like I had a part of my personality back. Something that I'd missed for years.

It confused me but also gave me a small smile which I hid to turn around and open the doors to the outside world. It was close to midnight I believe. I led him past the guards who glanced at my crest before automatically raising the bar and letting us out. He took my hand and led me towards the woods in a run.

I followed with the slightest bit of hesitance. Carlisle had never done anything to mark him untrustworthy but I was skittish and paranoid when I left the caverns, things felt louder and faster up above. My thoughts flowed together more up here leaving me to deal with a rush of emotions and doubts and fears but...this time it was different. I was focused on how his hand felt over mine. It was a loose grip, I could easily pull away if I wanted too.

"What now?" I asked, looking around at the dense foliage.

"Now just let your instincts run." He announced as we stopped running.

"I can't kill in Volterra. Aro would have me _executed_." I scoffed at his simple command. I wasn't planning on dying so soon.

"I made sure we're far enough out. I'm right here, I won't let you hurt anyone." He squeezed my hand ever so slightly as I stared at him, completely bewildered.

"You're actually serious right now?" I checked as I motioned to the area. It was silent except for the occasional rustle or bit of bird song.

"I am. It'll be okay, I promise." He nodded with an earnest face.

"Well...Alright I guess. I did ask to try it." I raised both of my brows as I shook my head.

I took in a deep breath awkwardly looking around for something to focus on. Sometimes I forgot to breath when I didn't really need to anymore, it felt weird to now. I paused as I heard something moving behind us. It was moving primarily on two legs. I could hear it hopping. It was a rabbit. I wanted it. I moved out of his reach and dived for the animal sinking my teeth into its back and draining it. I could hear the squeaks of panic and pain then silence. It stopped fighting back as I regained some semblance of ethics.

I sat down on my hind legs as I realised I just killed a bunny rabbit. It was almost a little sad. I felt actual depression at the fact that I'd just killed a little bunny rabbit. It was just hopping around and I ripped into it. I heard him kneel down next to me.

"I killed it." I mumbled to explain why I was just staring at the rabbit. I was trying to keep my lip from puckering up, it hurt to cry when you couldn't produce anything but venom.

"Its in a better place now, darling." He answered. I looked at him from the corner of my eye, he was looking at me with a slight frown.

"Thats just some empty thing people say when theres really nothing to say." I looked back at the bloodstained animal and wrapped my arms around my knees. It was a little difficult. I was chubbier at 145 pounds than most of the females in my area, luckily. It opened up the dating pool much more for me than most.

"Fair enough. You've saved one human life however." He snorted evenly. I shrugged at that.

"Whats one human life? They'll die no matter what I do, I'm not a bloody doctor. " I mumbled into my knees.

"Thats not very fair." Carlisle's voice was lower. I peeked over at him and raised a brow but didn't say anything. After the silence passed between us I decided to bury the poor creature. It was the least I could do. I took off my cloak and gloves in case I got them dirty and set to digging a little hole nearby a large cypress tree. I patted the ground when I stood and looked back at Carlisle, he was smiling again.

"Why are you smiling this time?" I was continuously confused by the man as I took a few steps closer, inspecting the crinkles. He seemed so happy go lucky and cheerful I didn't know what to make of it. Or more that I didn't know what to make of the feelings and urges he gave me.

"You." His answer was cryptic. I squinted at him for some sort of sign as I leaned in, not touching him still. I really wanted to though. I wanted to run my fingers over the little lines again to see if they felt the same as I remembered.

"Care to tell me any more details?" I raised a brow as I tilted my head ever so slightly.

"You just buried a rabbit, love. Its something that you don't see very often and so I found it amusing." He decided, leaning a little closer to me as he motioned to the grave-site behind me.

"May I?" I asked as I raised my hand. I wasn't wearing the gloves so I wanted his express permission in case there was something personal. I'd assumed Aro had already explained my gift to the man and that he was making an informed decision.

"Go right ahead." He nodded earnestly, leaning a little closer.

"Did you know I could manipulate memories when you touched me in 1920?" I just barely touched the corner near his blonder lashes when I was hit with the most recent memories that I'd missed in the last graze, 10 years ago. It was odd as this time it seemed I wasn't the only living them, I was watching them from an outside perspective of snippets. Carlisle didn't understand how to organize his memories after centuries, he just let them run through.

A redheaded teenager was rebelling against his father, he wanted to give into the urges for blood while his father denied him. Edward. The boy's name was Edward. Edward had left him a year prior to...he didn't know really what he was going to do. He kept thinking about her...the feel of her skin, the smell of her hair...Lottie. Irish. Gifted with memory manipulation. Funny. Affectionate. Interesting. Mysterious. Mate. Loneliness. Loneliness for a year. Leaving his teaching position to go find her. Not going through another century of loneliness.

"I didn't. I'm sorry I gave you that scare." Carlisle whispered. I looked back up to meet his eyes. They were lidded now, looking down at me from his height to mine. Woah. He was bloody close, did I lean on him or did he lean on me? What was the protocol for knowing here? I was almost panicking at just how close he was, I was distracted as I absently ran my fingers back over the lines on each eye.

"Why did you come here?" His hand held onto mine as I traced the lines making me jerk back. I wasn't expecting him to touch me _back_.

"O-oh my gosh. I am so sorry." I didn't know why I'd done it and for a second I went into a panic mode expecting him to be angry I'd jerked back from him and went bug-eyed.

"You know why I came here." He answered honestly with a raised brow. I just turned and continued walking without speaking for fear I'd dig myself into a deeper hole. He didn't though, instead he just walked next to me until I paused by the tree again. Poor bunny.

"Lottie..." After a minute or two I felt fingers drift over Alec's wound on my neck and tried to moved away from them as far as I possibly could with a yelp.

"Lottie! I'm not going to hurt you! Its okay." Instead two arms wrapped themselves around my torso, I struggled in a panic as they tightened and his voice softened. Then I went entirely slack. I felt like possum with my head slumped over to the side, playing dead. It was absolutely cowardly but I felt like it was okay to do that around him...for whatever reason?

"Who did that?" He spoke softly as we slowly sunk to the ground. I felt like I had to respond.

"Why do you want to know?" I was practically sassing him.

"Why do you keep asking questions you already know the answer to?" He spoke into loose curls. I shrugged awkwardly as he shifted me to lay more in his lap.

"...Because I want to hear it." I muttered as an answer. I felt him smile into the side of my head and furrowed my brow at it.

"Very well. Its because it's an area of concern for me. Someone has tried to claim my mate, I don't appreciate it."

"You shouldn't have used that term. " I scrunched up my face at the term and pulled away from him. What did it really mean? I'd be his prisoner for whatever length of time I was alive? I was a bartering piece between him and Aro? If Aro ever found out, he'd never let me go.

"Lottie..." Carlisle caught my hand to stop me from walking away as he frowned down at me. I merely raised a brow in return.

"I can take you away from here. I can help you." He wrapped his hands around my forearms as he pressed his lips against my forehead.

"You just have to let me." The action made me pause, it was so simple yet it striked a strong chord with me. I frowned, my face still scrunched up at the thoughts of how Aro could use this all against him.

"Enough." I shook my head one more time as I pushed away from him and turned my back.

"Lottie...Please." He sounded almost depressed now. I forgot he'd spent centuries alone, trying to end his life.

"No." This was for the better. The less he knew, the less Aro could use. I picked up my cloak and left. This had been a bad idea from the beginning to the start.

* * *


	5. Chapter 5

"Charlotte." Aro smiled pleasantly at me as I stared back at him. Carlisle disappeared after our little...thing a few days ago when Aro called me into the throne room.

"I think we know why I've called you here." His fingers were steepled against each other under his chin as he sat there. I figured it had a lot to do with manipulation Carlisle into staying here but I didn't say anything. Aro let out lithy laugh as Chelsea came up behind me and put a hand over my shoulder.

"Hes very attracted to you but...still bonded to the outside world, Chelsea can't _quite_ get him. I'm relying on you to finish the job for her. With whatever means necessary excluding death, of course." Aro finished with another smile, this time showing teeth as I bowed my head to him. It felt foggy as I felt her hand leave my skin.

"Perfect. Off you go." He made a sweeping motion with his hand towards the door as I nodded and followed his orders. I went mindlessly to the end of the hall, knocking on Carlisle's room.

"Come in." He opened the door, stoic until he realized who it was exactly and ushered me in. I was almost surprised at how easy it was for me to come in as I sat down near his bed.

"What brings you here?" He asked as I sat silently in the corner of his room.

"Um." I frowned as I tried to think of what to say to him but couldn't quite come up with the words. It was foggy still but slowly becoming clearer.

"Lottie? It's okay. Take your time, I know you've been stressed recently and I apologize for that." He kneeled down next to me, hesitantly placing hand over my clothed knee. He was patient as always. I reached forward, pulling a glove off my hand and moved towards his head. I was acting on the only order I had clear in my mind.

"I'm..." I paused for a second as my hand just ghosted over his hair. The vision of him becoming more and more clear. It was like a fog had been lifted from my brain but I felt depressed but happy but panicked as he stared up at me, understanding slowly what I was pausing over.

"I'm sorry." I whispered as I shook my head and I placed my hand over his forehead. If I didn't do this, Aro would execute me for disobeying him. I'd be tortured by Jane and Alec until I cried for death. I watched it happen so many times over in Aro's memories. He reveled in their pain and screams.

"I forgive you." He reached up, bring it down to his lips. He kissed it softly and placed it on his head once more as I stared down at him. He'd been worried over me, I think. The image of me turning my back on him kept replaying. He was hurt and miserable. Couldn't quite figure out what was going on. I froze as I heard his voice come through crystal clear on the last replay, _"Why?"._ He'd figured out how to speak over the memories.

"Why what?" I frowned in confusion as I took in the fact that this was even possible and retracted my hand. It was a little unnerving.

"Why do you keep me out?" He asked softly, leaning a little closer to me. I pursed my lips in thought, it took some effort to get past ' _K_ _eep him here._ '

"I...I was trying to avoid this. You have a life out there. I lost mine ages ago. I wanted you to have a chance, _why_ would you even come here?" I felt the urge to dry heave from tears come around again, I was almost angry he'd put himself into this situation. He snorted as he shook his head.

"Not anymore. Edward gave up the life style. I was alone for years before I gave up on trying to forget you. I came here for you. I'm lonely, Lottie. I don't want the outside world if it means being alone for another century." He frowned up at me. He'd paused after he confessed he'd tried forgetting about me but continued when I didn't speak still.

"Then I'm sorry for this. It might hurt." I pursed my lips as I nodded, placing my hand over him again. I had to do this. I didn't want too. Everything in me wanted to avoid this but Aro wouldn't let go of it. He wanted the bond to the coven reinforced, unbreakable by anyone except me. I could just not do this.

"It's okay." He nodded as he took in a breath and closed his eyes. He'd just given me permission to hurt him and take his sanity. Why would he do that? No. Forget the questions it had to be done.

"Here we go." I whispered as I closed my eyes. Searching through the memories. I grabbed onto a particular memory of him in a hospital of sorts, pulling it apart to put myself in it. He'd feel the need to stay here the farther back I appeared in his memories. I felt him cringe under my hand. Was I hurting him?

"Am I hurting you?" I opened my eyes, letting go of the memory immediately to focus on him.

"A little." He admitted, eyes closed with a knot in his brow.

"Oh. I'm sorry." I apologized to him for the 30th time today and closed my eyes.

It was such an empty phrase. 'Sorry', it was something people said when they knew they'd hurt someone and would do it again. Alec said sorry everytime he hurt me. That didn't stop him from doing it again. I peeked down at the blonde doctor, vulnerable and willing in front of me. He didn't seem like the kind of guy to do that. He was different. He wasn't like Alec.

I paused again, my emotions kept retching back at me. He was so compassionate and kind. He didn't deserve this. Why would I ever agree to do this to him? I'd killed and hurt so many people over the years, I deserved this more than him. I bit my lip as I stared down at him. can't. I took my hand back and stood, shaking my head.

"Lottie. W-what are you doing?" He stood with me, frowning as he looked at me. I felt my face squench up as I started sobbing. He just pulled me against his chest, wrapping his arms around my back. It felt like decades of repression of sadness and guilt just caught up with me as I squeezed his waist. He just continued humming something as he rubbed my back.

"I-I can't do it. I just can't stay here anymore. Hes going to kill me. This c-cave. Its going to kill me." I sobbed, muffled, into his chest. I couldn't produce tears which made crying physically painful for me but I felt like I deserved this. I killed hundreds of humans and many more vampires. Hell I'd even manipulated a few. I didn't have the right to take away their lives or their memories.

"Its okay, Lottie." He pulled back, placing his hands on my cheeks. He was smiling.

"No! I almost did the same thing t-to you." I shook my head at him.

"Nonsense. I knew you wouldn't hurt me like that, darling." He looked proud almost as I stared up, confused at his sudden burst of happiness.

"But...why were you going to let me?" I furrowed my brow, still confused.

"I think you need to figure that part out yourself, just know I never believed you'd hurt me." He said softly, kissing the crown of my head. It sounded like he'd acted part of this, a charade to give me the sudden break of emotions. It was almost angering.

"I'll be _ashes_ before I figure it out." I hissed as I glared up at him.

"Nonsense. We're going to talk to Aro. Hes a friend of mine, Lottie." His eyes darkened and his grip tightened at the statement. I bit my lip at that and shrugged. Its not like there was anything else I could say right now. He looked determined as he pulled me along, out of the door and back down the hall into the throne room.

"Ah. Carlisle. How pleasant to see you, dear friend." Aro stood from his throne, walking closer to us. Holy fuck we were here. How did we go here so fast? I glanced around the room and spotted Alec watching silently with Jane by his side. I directed my attention solely to Aro when I felt the fear pick up just from seeing Alec standing there.

"I trust that everything is...well." His eyes lingers on the joined hands with bated interest. I could feel Alec's eyes digging into my shoulders, making me want to hunch over ever so slightly.

"I have appreciated your time and hospitality, Aro. But now...we must go, old friend." Carlisle seemed to have noticed my discomfort as he changed positions. This time he stood closer to me, wrapping an arm around my waist. His tone was respectful while I felt like a child being taken out of daycare. It was almost irritating as Aro sighed.

"I see. Are you sure, Charlotte?"I felt pulled between being in tune with my feeling and...a blur. Warm oblivion. I looked over at Corin and felt it ebb away back to the panic. Oh. I can't believe I'd never realised what she was doing, for years. Why was I only just now realizing it was her? Carlisle's scent drifted over me as I remembered what was going on.

"I'm sure." I answered quickly looking back to Aro who frowned. It seemed he was betting on Corin to change my mind or at least numb me towards acceptance. It was sometimes odd to see him actually frown when the man seemed to have a constant, eerie, smile.

"Its a shame to see you come and go with a member of my guard." Aro seemed to almost glare, like a child losing it's toys.

"Let them go, Aro. You have more than enough guards as it is." Marcus called out from the back. I looked back to him as he seemed to almost bow his head towards Carlisle and I. At first I was confused that Marcus would speak up, the man was comatose from grief most of the time. But then I recalled his propensity for love and the fact he could see relationships.

"One does not have the same value as another." Aro glared at his brother of sorts as I pursed my lips.

"Then perhaps...it is best we see this as my notice of resignation, my lord." I spoke up, bowing my head to him. I could always come out with his lies if I needed, honestly.

"Very well, Charlotte. It is a shame, indeed. I do hope we don't later find _you_ in violation of the law." Aro's head tilted as his face became pinched with irritation, yet he still smiled. He'd always reminded me of a reptile like that, smiling as he devoured you.

"It was a pleasure to see you again, Aro." Carlisle commented pleasantly. I was almost surprised Caius hadn't backed him but at the same time he never really spoke up in these situations unless he had a personal interest conflict. Instead Caius rolled his eyes at the scene finding himself to be above it all.

"And the same to you. May I know when you intend to take your leave?" Aro's words were short and concise. He did this when he was trying to veil anger while still letting the others know of his state. Sometimes I didn't understand why he bothered to attempt to conceal anything.

"Tonight." Carlisle's words were just as short and cut. He didn't bother maintaining anything other than an air of respect. I froze at his answer of tonight.

"Very well. Alec will miss your presence, Charlotte." Aro sighed as he sat back down.

"Thank you again for your hospitality. Goodbye, old friend." Carlisle didn't seem to realize my hesitation as he continued on with his sentiment, taking a bow. He led us away as I stared, wide eyed at the floor as we went. I was wondering what I'd really gotten myself into at this point.


	6. Chapter 6

"Whats the problem, Lottie?" Carlisle sighed as he watched me stare at the half empty closet. He'd asked me which ones I actually liked and which I didn't want to keep by pointing at each outfit, going down the line until there was nothing left.

"Its just a big rush, I guess. I mean I don't want to stay longer but it feels like there's a catch I haven't seen yet." I frowned at the remaining clothes in thought.

"It would only make sense for you to be hesitant. You've spent a good 15 years here." Carlisle sighed as he shrugged and held out a hand, palm up, for me to take. He was always so understanding. How did that even work?

"I guess so." I nodded as I took it, he pulled me along and just like that. I left the only place I'd known since beginning this life with a single suitcase and the man that carried it.

* * *

A year passed quickly with Carlisle by my side, at first I wasn't sure about him but soon I found I didn't want to be anywhere without him. He was often the stabilizing force for my blood lust, with him I could over come it easily. When he felt I could be alone in the house, he picked up his old teaching job in the University of Chicago.

We were married within the first month or so after leaving. I'd worn something simple for my time, it was something I'd hoped to wear to my original wedding, when I was a human. It'd had short sleeves and a square shape to it. Each bit of fabric came flared out on the bottom in layers giving me a softer look with a bow in the middle. It'd been a lovely day until one of the Denali sisters cracked a joke about our wedding night.

I think it was Tanya who'd said something about it, joking around. Things were going well enough to the point that I felt I could undress around him without feeling panicked or unsure. But even so, I still hadn't slept with him.

It scared me which led to there being absolutely no wedding night. That I felt bad for but I was also grateful to Carlisle. He'd understood and hadn't held it against me. He'd pushed at one point last week, but let it go and went to finish himself off after I said no. Though it'd left me with an itch to continue from where we left off.

He'd been uneasy around me since, however. I felt it was silly of him to be uneasy around his mate but technically he'd not marked me just yet either. He claimed people sometimes change in personality when they find their mate. That was a scary thought to me, the thought of the unknown.

I paused from staring blankly at my book when I heard the front door open and close. We lived out of the city limits so it was hard for me to mistake the sound of our front door and anyone else's.

"Carlisle?" I called out warily, freezing up the slightest bit. I was still skittish these days though it was close to passing.

"I'm here." He called out quietly, not coming around the corner into the living room where I was sitting.

"You can come in, you know. I'm not mad." I started smiling at every hesitant and quiet step the man took in the foyer. Goodness I loved him.

"Are you sure?" His head poked around the corner as the rest of his body followed along behind him after I nodded. He was still wearing a suit and smelled like chalk and dust over the smell of cinnamon.

"How was your day?" I patted the place next to me on the couch, motioning for him to sit there.

"Better now. I was worried all that I'd scared you." He collapsed into the sit with a sigh of relief, slowly wrapping an arm around the back of our suede couch. 1931 didn't have the nicest furniture that I'd seen.

"Nope." I shook my head and smiled at him. He looked even more relieved when I leaned closer and kissed his cheek.

"We should look into you getting involved in a hobby, Lottie. I feel like you're bored all alone all day here." He observed. I gave an awkward half nod, half shrug.

"A little." I sighed as I closed the book I'd been staring at. I don't think I even flipped a single bloody page since I opened it.

"Well..." He pursed his lips as he rubbed my left bicep in thought.

"I just want to get a better handle on the whole blood lust bit. Don't feel like biting off someone's head just yet." I smiled at him as I laid a hand over his thigh and squeezed it lightly, then retracted it as he nodded.

"Fair enough. What were you reading then?" He asked curiously as he slipped the black book out of my hands and flipped it over.

" _Vile Bodies_...Sounds racy." He raised a brow as I shrugged. He looked surprised I'd read something like that. I suppose the title was a little misleading.

"I don't think I was even really reading the bloody thing." I grinned at his expression and rolled my eyes. He put a hand over my thigh and rubbed it as he chuckled, it felt warm despite both of our bodies lacking heartbeats. Though that may have just been me thinking about last week again. He'd been commanding but just gentle enough that I could have easily slipped into it if he hadn't focused around my neck to claim me. It reminded me too much of Alec.

"Hey...Lottie?" He called me from the memories as I remembered we were on the couch still and tried to calm myself down.

"Hm?" I answered with a small smile as I took in his features.

"Whenever you feel ready...I won't try to claim you over his scars." He gave me a tight smile that betrayed his nerves. It seemed he'd been thinking about it too I guessed.

"I think...now that I know you more and all that stuff, it'd be...okay." I took pauses trying to figure out a way that this didn't seem like a cop out of last week...but I don't think it really worked.

"And you know me so much more after a _week_?" He scoffed.

"Maybe I do." I narrowed my eyes as he dismantled my attempt.

"Alright so maybe you do, and then what, Lottie? What then?" He raised both brows as I paused before answering him. I kept wanting to prove him wrong on this but I didn't know how to entirely.

"You'll see." I nodded to myself and crossed my arms over my chest.

"When?" He had the same pacified look on his face with both brows waiting. It seemed like my attempts to cover my tracks were appeasing his curiosity if nothing else.

"Um..." He started to smile as I paused, okay so maybe I was just amusing him. I sighed as another minute passed and he started to full out chuckle.

"Rude." I huffed as I glared forwards at an empty creme coloured wall. I was almost irritated now.

"N-no. I'm sorry. Please do continue to tell me how things are different." The couch was shaking as he continued laughing. I gritted my teeth as I made up my mind and swung a hose covered thigh over his lap, straddling him now.

His laughter subsided almost immediately after as his eyes became misty and lidded. I recognized the look from last week and went with it, slowly lowering my face to his. He pulled my lips down to meet his a second later after he wrapped a hand into my curls.

"Someone's quiet now." We were breathing heavily when I pulled back in the slightest and leaned my forehead on his with a smile when he growled from a loss of contact.

"You can't keep getting me riled up out of spite, Lottie." He determined, almost irritated as he pressed the hardened length onto my pelvis. I stilled as it occurred to me that he was actually very much interested in my body and my personality right now.

"Get off, please. I need to go take care of this before it gets out of hand." He sighed heavily as he let go of me and waited for me to move. I guess my pause led him t think otherwise.

I didn't get off of him. Instead I choose to grind into him out of an urge I wasn't entirely sure I understood. The reaction it elicited was him gripping my hips roughly and a groan out of his throat as he closed his eyes and threw his head back. That was entertaining.

"Y-you can't do that." He shook his head, eyes still closed.

"I think I can." I whispered and tilted my head. I pressed my lips against his and grinded again, harder this time when his hips rose up to meet mine. His hand slipped up from my hips to unbutton my shirt as he molded his lips onto mine. When the shirt came off I felt his fingers start to roll the nipple forcing my back to arch as I moaned then came down to nip at his shoulder. This was a new feeling to me but it was _great_.

"W-where are we going?" I asked, breathless sounding. I pulled away from his shoulder to kiss his lips for a second as he picked me up. I automatically wrapped my legs around his waist. I kept both hands fisted into his hair and suit shirt, moving from his lips down to his jaw and his neck.

"Upstairs." His voice was deep and gravelly at the moment leaving me with shivers. I decided I liked the sound of it as he started planting kissing and sucking at the skin on my shoulders.

"Are you sure?" He asked me one more time as he dropped me on the bed gently. He held out a hand as he straddled me, waiting for an answer. I grinned as I grabbed a portion of his shirt and brought him down to me, with a clacking of teeth knocked on each other roughly, I'd sealed my fate.

We acted in part on lust and the other was pure instincts, he'd stand to pull off pants while I slipped off the skirt. I went for the pantyhose when he stopped me and instead ripped them in delight. We moved in sync once he'd entered me, he was gentle still until I started to slide back on his cock with some extra force.

He growled and stilled me by holding my hips still as he propped one of my legs over his left shoulder and the other by his hip. I couldn't quite move as much leaving him in control to pump as slow or as fast as he wanted. He'd started to slow down, leaving me to whine and try to squirm for the friction.

"Say it and I'll let you come." Carlisle growled, his voice was calm but serious as his slow thrusts continued.

"Say what?" I whined. I knew the answer but I didn't know if I could say it out loud right now.

"Always asking questions you know the answer too." He started to almost pet my left thigh as he pressed a kiss against it and watched me squirm with a slow grin.

"Say it, Lottie." He growled a minute later of my squirming. He was barely moving now, on the verge of pulling out when I tried to move back towards him and he stopped me.

"I'm yours." I murmured as he started to thrust again, harder and faster now.

"Louder." He grunted. I would have been shifted upwards with every brutal thrust if he hadn't of held my hips. I could feel a heat building up as I started to moan louder and louder. For a second I was worried about the neighbors calling the cops then realised we didn't really have any.

"Say it louder, Lottie." He ordered, thrusting harder as I felt my back begin to arch up again.

"I-I'm yours!" I didn't think I could take it anymore when I screamed it and lost myself entirely. It was like Alec's gift, snuffing out all my senses but it left one very real feeling behind. Ecstasy.

"Are you alright?" Carlisle's voice drifted over my ears as I grinned back at his worried face.

"I'm bloody spectacular. Are you?" I asked as I kissed the tip of his nose.

"I feel like I'm walking on air." His worry broke into happiness as I rolled my eyes at the mushy comment.

We stayed in bed until the next day or so. I didn't feel the need to drink or anything, I just wanted to curl up into Carlisle and listen to his stories of his past. It was hard to believe the man was over 200 hundred years old while I was just 21 there abouts.

He didn't act uneasy around me after that, thankfully. If anything he seemed more free and open. I felt the same with him, it was like a complete redo in that one moment, I felt connected to someone. Someone that was real. They were my someone, not another's in some bloody memory from another century.

"I need to go to work, love." He muttered into my hair as I squeezed my arms around his neck. I sighed and released him turning to stand up when I looked down at my thigh.

"Jaysus fuckin' christ. You took a chunk out of me leg!" I exclaimed as I looked at the half healed mark. It'd definitely taken considering I didn't even feel it and even now it just looked odd on the pale skin.

"Nonsense. It'll heal up fine, Lottie." He declared as he got off the bed. I scoffed at his calm voice.

"Easy for you to say." I huffed. He raised a brow as he turned his head back around. He walked quickly over and kneeled down. I watched with confusion as he just barely kissed the wound and I felt waves of warmth go up to my ears.

"No fair." I scoffed as I pulled a bit away from him.

"Oh don't worry. I've offically got one too." He pulled part of his collar down to reveal a hickey of sorts on his shoulder.

"Damn. That one's much deeper." I commented warily as my fingers ghosted over it and he snorted. I wasn't entirely sure when that happened but I'd guessed it was before we got to the bed.

"Who knew you were that rough, huh?" He grinned lazily as he kissed my cheek and continued getting dressed. I laid back on the bed and watched him tie the black tie around his neck, straightening it just so. He put on his coat and went towards the door and stairs, I followed behind him. Admiring his arse. It was great to behold and it was even better that it was all mine.


	7. Chapter 7

"When is your lunch break again?" I asked for like the third time as I flopped over Carlisle's lap, distracting him from his newspaper. I wanted his attention basically.

"1:30 but I'm meeting a colleague so maybe a little later." He sighed as he pulled his arms out from under my back and set them over my front.

"Oka-" One went across my mouth, sealing it while the other landed just below my natural waist. I glared at him as he smugly flipped to the next page of his paper.

"Wanker." I lightly flicked his left ear, making him jump and giving me just enough time to get the word out.

"Its not my fault you can't keep up with my schedule, love." He grinned cheekily as I rolled my eyes and stood.

"Its not my fault your schedule is so bloody boring." Wandering towards the shelves of books he'd brought home over the past year. I remembered when he'd started bringing them home as I ran my finger down the spine of a particular favourite of mine.

_"And why can't you go to the book store for it?" He crossed his arms as he waited for my response._

_"Because... I don't want to." We had just gotten to Chicago and I was in a bit of a mess. I was too scared to leave the house, scared I'd hurt someone or hurt myself somehow but I was so_ bored _here. I spent the first day in bed then got tired of it. Carlisle was here all the time but I was still so bored._

_"So you're making me go out into the snow at 11 PM to get you a book because you don't want too." He stated as he looked at me. I pursed my lips as I nodded slowly, that was pretty much it._

_"What do I get in return?" He tilted his head as he waited for the response._

_"You...get to...cuddle with me?" I asked slowly._

_"Sounds good. I'll be back in 20 minutes, Lottie." I was flabbergasted as he slid on the coat and left. Did not think that'd work._

I felt a hand on my lower back and jumped. After that he'd just started to bring one back from his way home from work every other day. I went through them rather quickly. It was hard not to when you didn't have to really move for 12 hours and the only entertaining thing was the book in front of you.

Memories like that, ones that were actually mine, they came and went these days. I never had them until Carlisle came around though I feel like that was due to the terrible two of Corin and Chelsea constantly fucking with my head.

"-okay?"

"I'm sorry?" I felt Carlisle's voice come through and twisted my head back to look at him over my shoulder.

"Memory?" He pursed his lips as I nodded to his question. He sighed as he planted a light chaste kiss over my shoulder and pulled away, walking towards the front room.

"Where are you going?" I asked as some fear leaked into my voice as I quickly followed him and wrapped a hand around his. He wasn't supposed to leave yet, he'd just gotten home from work. Why would he leave so soon? Did the drifting annoy him? Did _I_ annoy him?

"I was going to get your coat, love. Don't worry. I wouldn't leave you behind." He wrapped a hand around my neck and jaw, calm and compassionate with his words. I let out a breath of relief, I was going with him wherever he was going then. That was much better than the ideas I had brewing up. I'd gotten better at that in the last year or so but sometimes my anxieties got the best of me.

"Where are we going?" I asked as I slide an arm into each sleeve and pulled my hair out from under the furry collar. It reached the back of shins when I was fully upright and not slouching over like I tended to do.

"We're going to walk around downtown, try to get you used to the sounds and people." He smiled as he slid on his own coat. I frowned at the idea and froze as he waited for me to take his outstretched hand.

"Whats wrong?" He queried after a second of me not moving towards him.

"I don't want to go downtown. Last time was too much." I replied as he wrapped a hand around my bare skin. I could feel my brows knot up and the corners of my mouth tilt down as I thought about what happened six months ago when we last tried this.

_"Lottie!" I ran down the street at a inhuman speed. She was so much farther ahead of me though, I should have thought about this. I should have asked her. Now she'd run off god knows where. Every once in a while I could hear her yelp at every sound of a car honking or screeching by her but it wasn't enough for me to find her. I was still looking for her. Why di-_

"Hey." He shook my wrist as I peered down at it then looked back up at him.

"Hi." I responded loftily. That was a new thing. Him pulling me out of memories. It was almost refreshing.

"We're taking it one step at a time this time. No running off but I won't push you. Deal?" He asked, drawing a circle into the flat portion of my wrist. I sighed and nodded.

It was breezy and loud here. Only a few humans had a vehicle but the ones that did were loud enough about it to scare the piss out of me every time. I hadn't actually left the house without Carlisle ever but I'd only ever come to the busy part of town 6 months ago. After that I didn't leave the house unless we went to hunt. Sometimes I still felt a tad bad about killing harmless forest animals.

"Can we go in there?" I asked as I nodded towards the pet shop. I could hear a pitter patter of heart beats from rabbits, cats, dogs, and other little animals.

"Of course." He squeezed my hand and led me across the street.

"Feckin' Hell's bells." I hissed. We stepped in and I immediately stopped breathing from the horrific level of _odor_ this place had. Carlisle snorted lowly as he too stopped breathing but still made the shoulder gestures. I paused as I came around to a kitten with white fur and red eyes. She stared back at me as I stared at her.

"I can take her out of the case if you'd like to hold her." I looked around to the boy dressed as a store employee and nodded. Carlisle said nothing as the store attendant placed her into my arms, at first she seemed a little panicked but calmed quickly. Enough to fall asleep right there. The attendant walked away quickly after the second attempt at conversation with me fell through. I was entirely distracted by the cat, gently rubbing her head between the ears. She felt soft and warm in my arms.

"You look like you're holding your first child." Carlisle commented with some amusement and affection as I looked up at him.

"If this is what a child feels like, I'd love to have one." I mumbled as the kitten began to purr in my arms.

"Lottie..."His face changed ever so slightly before returning back to an amused smile.

"Yes?" I answered softly as I continued to pet the cat.

"If you want the cat, we'll get it but you just have to remember one thing." He sighed.

"I know. I don't want to eat it." I grinned, cracking a joke. I felt a bit of joy spring at his reply. It was like I'd have a companion to keep with me when he was gone all day. The house got awfully silent sometimes, almost a bit creepy.

"No, remember that the cat will only live 10 years at most." He frowned.

"Oh." I mumbled as I felt a bit of cold sadness rush through my veins at the idea. I'd become incredibly attached from just holding the little furry babby.

"Can I help with anything?" The sales attendant came by again, this time less enthusiastic.

"Lottie?" Carlisle put a hand on the small of my back as I stared down at the sleeping kitten in my arms. I looked back up at the boy after a second or two.

"We'd like to adopt her, please." I whispered.

"Thats great! Not many people choose cats these days." The attendant looked excited at it and nodded, making conversation as we walked.

"Why is that?" I asked softly looking between Carlisle and the boy.

"Theres been talk of the cats giving people diphtheria but there's been talk of that for years now, Miss. I wouldn't put any thought behind it, shes clean as a whistle." He continued motioning to the kitten. I shrugged at the idea. I seriously doubt the cat could give Carlisle or I a single issue past destroyed furniture.

"Why a cat?" Carlisle asked as we went down the streets of Chicago at 9 PM. I took in a deep breath when we left the pet shop a few minutes ago with a bed, toys, a collar, and food in hand.

"She just stole my heart, the wee furry little babby." I grinned down at the white kitten. We'd gotten a little crate for the thing but I elected to carry her in my arms since she was still sleeping.

Things had been tough in America these past few years but we were still covered by Carlisle's lifetime savings thankfully. Stores were closing up and the lines for soup kitchens were longer. Maybe one day I'd volunteer at one. We walked for maybe an hour more when I heard someone call out to Carlisle. I turned around to see a tall vampire with blood red eyes and long sandy hair that looked like it'd been pulled back.

"Hey! Didn't think I'd see your face 'round these parts. " He spoke with a slight deeper American accent as he grinned, coming into hug Carlisle. I hadn't quite got the hand of American accent's past Carlisle's.

"We live here." Carlisle grinned back. They must be friends then. I wondered if I heard of this guy before.

" _We_? All my eye. This your wife and you haven't introduced us yet?" He punched Carlisle's arm lightly as he spoke. 'All my eye'? What the hell did that mean? Was he gone in the head?

"Garrett, madam." He tipped his head down at me, as I nodded back at him. I think Carlisle mentioned him once before when we were sending out wedding invitations. This was one of his friends from the past, one that I didn't think went to our wedding...which honestly was totally fine with.

"Lottie." I replied, making him pause.

"You're not a brit, are ya?" He stared as I snorted.

"Not bloody likely. I'm Irish born." I shook my head and corrected him.

"Hate the Brits then?" He sort of just stared in anticipation.

"With a passion." I grinned as Carlisle just snorted next to us. The answer seemed the thrill Garrett as he threw an arm around my clothed shoulders in an odd little side hug. I found it was okay with me, surprisingly.

"Thats my kinda women right there, Carlisle. Shes a keeper for sure." He nodded with a grin. I liked Garrett, he was carefree for the most part which was nice.

"I'm glad you both hate my country then." Carlisle gave a smile as he spoke and started walking again. I followed close behind talking to Garrett about where he was from and when he'd turned, what it was like etc... I was a nosy bint basically. I didn't want to touch his skin but I was ridiculously curious, it came with usually knowing all about a person with one touch


	8. Chapter 8

"Is that a cat?" Garrett asked incredulously, looking between Carlisle and I. He was pointing at the sleeping fur ball in my arms.

"Really?" He asked after I nodded proudly, she was something to take care of and keep me company.

"She wanted one." Carlisle shrugged it off easily while I ignored most of the surroundings to focus on the two vampires.

"Whew. I see whose the boss here." Garrett stuck his hands deep into his pockets as we walked into the house.

"Barely." I rolled my eyes at it as Carlisle just quietly closed the door behind us. We sat down on the couch as Garrett began his origin and how he knew Carlisle. Half way through the kitten hopped out of my arms and elected to sleep next to me on the floor. Apparently my arms moved too much for it's preference.

"And then what?" I asked with anticipation and wide eyes. Garrett was telling me about his turning story, he'd been fighting for the revolution before I'd even been born yet. I don't think my parents were even born yet.

"I woke up. Just like that." Garrett waved his had slowly through the air, letting out a slow whistle to demonstrate his point.

"Oh wow." I grinned and sat back from leaning so close to him.

"Then I met this guy like 20 years later in France. Studying to become a doctor and all that." Garrett jerked his finger over to my husband who snorted and shook his head.

"You've always been a great story teller, Garrett. I'll give you that." Carlisle decided as he stood and went to take a step towards the stairs.

"Watch yer bloody foot!" I panicked exclaimed as I dived for the cat Carlisle's foot stood dangerously close too.

"Damn cat." Garrett started snickering as Carlisle cursed and continued up the stairs, more carefully now.

"I should probably hit the road. Great meeting you." A second later Garrett stood as well, stretching.

"You could stay for a day or two if you'd like." I stood as well, looking at him warily. I didn't want to pressure him but I was reallllly hoping he'd stay.

"Hm...Just a little while but then I'll have to be on my way." He pursed his lips but eventually nodded.

"Grand!" I clapped my hands together. Carlisle merely kissed me goodbye and waved to Garrett when he left for work 30 minutes later, saying nothing about Garrett staying or not staying. This made me think he was fine with it, a thought I would willingly continue on until he said otherwise.

Garrett was good company. He was charming and a gift entertainer, he'd even helped me name the kitten. It made me smile, Pluto. It'd actually come from a poem I'd seen in some paper somewhere.

But...whenever he'd go to brush against my skin I'd try to dodge it. We were in a library in the downtown area on a cloudy day when he tried to take a book from my hands as a joke and I just dropped the fucking thing. Finally one night a few days later he asked Carlisle about it when he seemed to think I was out of the house or something.

"I've been meaning to ask. Is she not allowed to touch other men or is it just me that she doesn't want to touch? I'm just worried I've made her uncomfortable." Garrett sounded worried as he spoke lowly down stairs. I could hear Carlisle move around on the couch as he sat up, closing something. Probably his paper knowing him.

"Oh she hasn't told you?" Carlisle sounded surprised as he checked.

"Thats surprising. I thought you two were good friends but...anyways. Its her gift. She can't control it, but, when she touches someone's bare skin she gets hit with their life story." I guessed Garrett just made a gesture because Carlisle continued on with his little thing. I heard a bell ring as the cat jumped off our bed and went to rub against my exposed ankle. She'd gotten a black collar with a little bell on it, I bent down and picked her up,

"Lottie?" Carlisle called out hesitantly. I sighed as I came down the stairs. He knew that the cat followed me whenever she saw me. It really only went to Carlisle when it was hungry and I wasn't around.

"Hi." I waved a little as I let Pluto climb over my chest and up to my shoulder. Damn cat gave me away.

Both Carlisle and Garrett started smiling as they took in the sight of a kitten climbing over me and settling on my shoulder. They didn't say anything about my snooping as they moved farther apart on the couch for me to sit down, which I was thankful. I felt bad about it but not enough to not do it anymore. We passed the night away quickly until Carlisle had to head into work again the next day, luckily he was about to have two days off. I was excited like usual.

Garrett and I decided to take a walk in the forests nearby. We were talking about everything and nothing at all, from a ladybug buzzing around to what he did when he was drifting from place to place. I looked up from the grass when he stopped talking right in the middle of a sentence.

"What?" I raised a brow. He held up hand to silence me.

"Theres...someone here. Come out!" He explained then cupped his hands around his mouth, calling out to the mystery person. I felt my muscles coiling with tension as I lowered myself into a defensive position. Starting out your life in the Volturi left you with a tendency to prepare for a fight automatically.

"I-I've come to see Carlisle." A red eyed boy came out of a tree nearby, walking a little too quickly towards us. Garrett reacted first, moving to incapacitate him. The boy's clothes were dirty with blood and grass. They smelled old, older than a week or two since the last wash, they also smelled a bit like rubbish. I was starting to think he'd pulled them out of a bin somewhere.

"And what for?" Garrett interrogated roughly as he held Edward up against the same tree he came out of. I stood slowly as I took in his features, I recognized his face.

"Edward?" I tested, tilting my head to the side with uncertainty. He has the same appearance but lacked any of the mannerisms from before. He was rough with his movements, his eyes jumping back and forth between Garrett and I with some fear.

"Yes! Please, you have to take me to Carlisle." His eyes snapped to mine. Desperate, confused, guilty, and frenzied. This was a shell of the boy I'd seen with my mate ages ago.

"You know him?" Garrett called out to me, glancing back as I nodded.

"He was with Carlisle when I first met him." I pursed my lips, nodding, as I felt pity for this child. He looked so young and scrawny with his clothes hanging loosely, but heavy. Like the weight of the world was on his back.

"Hes not here, boy." Garrett's accent came out as he used one of his little phrases I'd come to understand as 'southern'.

"Don't _lie_ to m-!" Edward growled until Garrett reciprocated and pushed him harder against the tree, cutting off his sentence. I could hear it's bark groaning at the pressure on it's trunk.

"He can read your thoughts, Garrett. Don't bother trying." I sighed as I took a few steps closer to him. Garrett sighed as he continued to glare at the dark redhead.

"Why do you need him?" I asked softly. My own colour was just a shade lighter than his. It was odd to me that I noticed the similarities at time like this.

"I messed up. I tried to only kill the bad guys, Lottie. I swear. But then...she just smelled so good and she screamed when I bit her. I need his help to repent. To make up for her life and the others." Edward's face began to scrunch up, the wrinkles near his eyes were deepening as he begged.

"Do you believe him?" Garrett looked back at me as I frowned and hesitantly reached out to Edward's cheek. The thought crossed my mind it was dangerous for me to put my hand near his teeth when he was in this sort of erratic state but I felt like he wouldn't bit if he knew what was good for him. His skin wasn't soft like Carlisle's it was harder.

_I know what to do. I didn't have to live this way, barely surviving off a rat here and a duck there. We were eating out of the lowest branch of society even though we should have been at the top. We were predators. I could find a better way, even take away some of the evil in this world. He didn't know, he'd never tried it. The fool was too reliant on the animals and vermin. It made him weak. I refuse to be this weak for the rest of my life. I could do something good. I know I can._

_I keep running out of men, I shouldn't have killed that woman. She had a child at home waiting on her. I can't do that ever again._

_I told myself I wouldn't do that ever again. Why did I let myself do that? She was an innocent. Barely 10 years old. I killed a child. I am the lowest of the low. I deserve to burn. This is the last time._

_Why can't I stop? I_ _**need** _ _to stop. I need his help. I was wrong. I have to find him before I take another innocent._

"Lottie?" Garrett was calling my name as I retracted my hand. Edward's face looked even more pained than before, like he was holding back dry tears.

"Hes telling the truth. Lets just take him. He'll just come back if we don't." I sighed as I turned my back and started to walk back the way we'd come. I could hear Edward's feet hitting the ground in a steady pace with Garrett's behind me. It was cloudy thankfully but because it was, I couldn't tell what time it was. I was just hoping it was close to when Carlisle would get home.

* * *

"Lottie?" Carlisle called out an hour later as Garrett held Edward's arms behind his back, sat on the chair next to me. I'd told him that I felt it was a little bit unnecessary but Garrett didn't really reply. Just tightened his grip.

"Edward?" Carlisle came around the corner when I didn't respond but paused at the sight of the redhead.

"We have a guest." I stated plainly. I was holding Pluto close to my chest. When we'd first come in, Edward seemed to eye the cat like a meal. Pluto didn't take kindly to it, hissing and arching his back. It had me picking the cat up as quickly as I could without hurting the poor thing. I understood he was thirsty, abstaining from humans and drinking animals had him like that but Pluto was _not_ on the fucking menu.

"Carlisle, please. I need your help. I can't stop myself. I understand what you meant now. I was foolish." Edward's attention immediately turned to the blonde as he begged him. Carlisle didn't respond as he looked at my solemn face. I felt pity but also quite a bit of animosity from the fact he eyed Pluto.

"Lottie? What do you think?" He asked, coming to stand near me.

"What do you mean?" I raised a brow at this. Was he trying to involve me in the decision?

"This is your home as much as mine." He spoke with a bit of a plea in his eyes. I stared at my husband's face for a minute before sighing. He had a good heart. It was open and forgiving as it was when I almost manipulated him, years ago.

"Ugh. Fine." I groaned as I nodded . I looked back at Edward as his eyes lit up. Garrett released his hold on the boy, taking a step back. I felt a bit of pride at the fact that I had control in this which I had a feeling was Carlisle's plan all along anyways.

"But! If you touch the cat, _I will tear off your arms and legs and burn you_." I held up at finger at the red eyed vampire, hissing the warning at him. Edward seemed to bit his lip before nodding quickly, still looking grateful.


	9. Chapter 9

"Do you have any hobbies?" I broke the silence first, looking up at Edward as I stroked Pluto's fur. He'd been staring blankly at the wall. I think he was just trying to over come the need to drink human blood.

"Please don't think that word." He croaked out, strained.

"Alright..." I raised a brow guessing at which he meant.

"Would you like to go hunt?" I asked warily, looking back at Garrett who sighed and stood.

"Yes, please." Edward nodded quickly.

"Lets go, copperhead." Garrett sighed as he stuffed his hands into his pockets. I put the cat down and stood as well, following next to Garrett. I looped my elbow through his and smiled up at him when he looked down at me.

"Ever going to tell me why you held out on the whole power bit?" He raised a brow, not discussing the elbow looping.

"It makes people uncomfortable. I like you and your humour. Didn't want to run you out of Chicago." I shrugged, watching Edward speed walk through the snow towards the wooded areas.

"Hard to run me out of here with just that, Lottie." He snorted.

"Fair enough." I grinned back at him, feeling alright for the first time in a while.

* * *

Garrett stuck around for the first few months of Edward's return for my sake. I couldn't hold back a rabid vampire that had been drinking humans by myself when he was that fresh on the wagon. As it turns out neither could Garrett. Edward wound up tearing into one of our neighbours in the middle of the bloody night so we moved. Up north. Way the hell up north. All the fuckin' way to New bloody York. I was raving mad with Edward at this point. I pulled a box out of the car Carlisle had gotten and bumped into Edward on the way into the house.

 _"WHY IN THE FECK WOULD YOU CHOOSE_ HER _?" Lottie screamed at me as she motioned to the dead girl on the floor. I didn't know what to say as she scolded me. I'd screwed up. Again. Not even Carlisle would look at me. He was so disappointed. I could hear it._

_I have to get her out of the state. She was doing so well here, she'd finally come out of her shell_ _..._ _He was just standing there disappointed in me failing and worrying about his wife's safety. I ruined everything. Again._

_"I-I don't know. I don't deserve to be here." I could feel my eyes begin to sting. Why was I cursed with so many emotions at once? It felt like I'd disappointed my mother at this point._

_"You're damn right you don't bloody deserve to be here. You're going to blow our cover." She practically spat as she glared at me, my heart was cracking as she glared at me. I could see the Celtic blood running hot in her veins at this point and it was all my fault._

_"Both of you. Enough. This is a bad situation but we're a family. We can pull together." Carlisle sighed as he began to rub her back._

_"Well what do you suggest then? His behaviour is out of control! He has to have some bloody consequences, Carlisle." She motioned to me with an exaggerated wave of her arms. I ruined everything I touched._

_"I know, love. But. Right now we have to deal with the body and leave. Quickly. Go pa-"_

"Dear?" I jumped a little as I blinked a few times.

"Sorry?" I looked up from the boxes to see Carlisle looking worried. Garrett was also looking but he had a better handle on the whole subtlety thing. Instead of staring he just fiddled with the car's mirror.

"Which memory was it?" Carlisle sighed as he took the box from my hand, stroking my arm as he did. I looked next to my arm at Edward's expression of pain and shook my head.

"One that is in the past. It won't be repeated." I said slowly, looking at Edward.

"It won't." He looked a little lighter as he cracked a crooked smile and nodded quickly.

"Better not." I warned as I turned around and grabbed another box since Carlisle had my last one. Edward nodded again and went into the house as Carlisle stopped my hand.

"Lottie? Which was it?" He asked putting a hand over mine.

_She'd looked magnificent in her dress. It was something that I wish my father could have seen, her walking down to me on the aisle. I searched for so long just to be alone for years but I finally found the one. Tanya always told me to keep the hope alive, the hope of finding a mate, and I did. She urged me to go after her, not even Aro could keep us apart._

_She looked nervous, walking. I wanted to reach out and tell her it'd be fine but she was so close._

_"Do you, Lottie Quinn, take Carlisle Cullen to be your wedded husband, through sickness and health, til death do you part under god's gaze?" We had a priest, he found us odd. I knew he did just from his eyes but I didn't care. I had a wife._

_"I do." She smiled at me through the veil, nervous. I loved that I knew her ticks and manners. I just loved that I knew her and that she'd said yes. Tanya asked about the activities in the bedroom but the physical could be damned. I didn't care if we never made love._

"I think that was my favorite moment in my entire life." Carlisle kissed the tip of my nose softly, bringing me out of it. The memory trips had gotten different lately, I feel like he'd been practicing almost. If that were possible.

"Oh really? Are you sure?" I teased with a small smile. He was such a teddy bear.

"I am. I spent the whole year before that wondering when you were going to leave me until you finally kissed me. Then when you said yes, you were pretty much stuck with me for life." He murmured, squeezing my hand softly.

"I might take you for life then, I suppose." I squeezed back with a small love sick smile creeping up onto my face.

The year before we married was a hard one. I remember being afraid of everything, a bird could chip outside and I'd jump. He had to spend his time with me non stop because when he left me alone I'd break down slowly. 8 hours was too long for me to be apart from him back then. I think the marriage cemented the bond a little more but the actual marking was when I finally calmed down. We were connected then.

* * *

"I think I'll take up knitting." I nodded to myself and the quiet living room.

"Right. And...the context is?" Carlisle looked up from his paper, next to me and slowly nodded. We'd finished unpacking the house last weekend but Carlisle had yet to find a job so he sat home with Edward and I most days. It was hard in this economy despite him having the qualifications that he did, people just couldn't pay much.

"A hobby. You told me to find a hobby." I looked at him like he was a gimp for wondering where I was coming from with this.

"That was seven months ago, Lottie." The right corner of his lip jumped up a tad letting me know he found me amusing again.

"Well now I have your answer. You're welcome." I huffed, looking back to my book.

"Can't argue with the women, Carlisle." Garrett's voice called from the side door. He must be back from hunting. We lived much farther out in the country this time, just to avoid any...unexpected deaths.

"Or maybe sewing. I could make clothes and cut back on the costs." I looked up from the book again after a few seconds. I'd seen patterns in the back of Carlisle's papers. He left them as a litter box of sorts for Pluto but maybe I could use them _then_ give them to the cat.

"Lottie, we have more than enough to ride the depression out. You don't have to start making our clothes, love." Carlisle reached over and wrapped his hand around mine as it held the edge of my book.

"Well yes, obviously. But still. It'd give me something to do." I shrugged, looking back at him on the couch with one leg crossed over another.

"I thought you had Pluto to take care of." He raised a brow as he motioned to the sleeping cat in my lap.

"Pluto's grown up, Carlisle." I sighed, taking in the white cat. They grew up so fast.

"Well you've always got Copperhead to take care of if you're looking." Garrett chimed in with a snort as he motioned to the melancholic boy sitting out side the house in the sunlight. We all looked at him for a second, thinking different things I'm sure.

"Not quite the same thing." I muttered with some annoyance as I looked at him through the windows.

"Care to hunt before I head off to another job interview?" Carlisle stretched as he stood.

"I suppose if I really must." I smiled cheekily as I took his extended hand.

"Always the joker." He grinned down at me, pecking the top of my head as we left towards the trees.

"You love it." I smirked.

"I love a lot of things about you." He whispered as we got farther away from the house, wrapping an arm around my waist.

"Like my ass? Don't try and lie, I _know_ you stare, love." I chortled with a small smile.

"I might glance, once or twice." He murmured into my ear, a smile in his voice. I could feel his hand slid down to pinch my ass before it settled back on my hip.

"Alright, alright. We hunt then we can roll around. Deal?" I jumped out of his reach and turned to stick my hand out for a shake.

"Fine." He smirked with warm, lidded eyes that ran up and down my frame as he shook my hand.

At first the hunting trip started out as normal as any other. He'd let me take the first stab at finding prey for us before he took over. I always stuck to rabbits for some reason but they just didn't have enough in them to be a meal for us. He found the deer or wolves when we were close by to them. Now it seemed to just be deer.

But...this time. I smelled something different. Something human. It was bleeding out, practically dead. I could hear it's heart beat giving out and bones cracking. I had to remind myself I wasn't personally killing them but I wanted to be in some sick way. I wanted to be the one, to claim my prize and drink. I almost got a just a little too close before Carlisle caught me. I snarled as a child cried and his arms tightened around me, whispering reasons I couldn't drink the dead human's blood. This was only the beginning of our problems in New York.


	10. Chapter 10

"Lottie?" I blinked a few times, almost glaring at the blonde man who held me back.

"Are you with me, love?" He held my head between his hands not letting me get away but he wasn't crushing me either. I nodded, staring into his eyes. I was slowly remembering where I was and this was Carlisle. My mate. I didn't enjoy losing control, it was all together a disorienting experience. I felt like sometimes I disappointed Carlisle when I lost it.

"Don't breath in." He warned quickly, looking to the right of us. I followed his gaze and froze. There was a baby with pale skin and red eyes staring back at us, covered in blood and other fluids. It looked like an awful murder scene with the child, culprit.

" **Bloody** hells bells, kill it! Now! You _know_ Aro what said! If he finds out we saw an immortal child and let it _live?_ " I screeched as I jerked back away from his hands and the infant with panic and fear. It was laying next to the dead woman staring at us as we stared back at it, I guess this was the child I heard screaming before. I'd just gotten Carlisle, I didn't want to just go and lose it all for this tyke. Edward, I could deal with. Carlisle was his creator but this child's creator was no where to be found.

"Listen. Can you hear it?" He hushed me quickly, holding my hand still.

"It has a heart beat." Carlisle motioned to his ear as he spoke. I paused for a second, hearing a tiny pitter-patter that picked up with speed but was steady on.

"But...that's impossible." I furrowed my brows, confused. I looked at the thing, laying next to the woman with it's blood red eyes. It's skin had the same crystal-like appearance when a ray of sunlight peeked through the trees. Carlisle stood, pulling me up with him as he walked hesitantly towards the infant. I took in a short breath and had to control myself the slightest bit. The blood disgusted me a little more than before but it was still tempting.

"Its a girl." His voice was full of interest that I lacked entirely. I felt like the child smelled entirely unappetizing.

"Thats great. It still killed the woman and it'll do it again when it gets thirsty!" I hissed motioning to the dead body, attracting flies at this point. I tensed as Carlisle knelled down in front of the thing and looked over the body it sat in front of.

"I think it did but not in the way you're thinking, love. All the blood's here but it's old, the female bled out." He responded patiently as he picked up a stick near by. He pointed to each area of interest with it.

"Ribs shattered, intestines have small rips and tears in them, it appears that the torso was torn apart from the inside. Most likely she tore her way out of the amniotic sac...and the stomach. But with what? Maybe teeth. She doesn't seem to have nails long enough, yet." Carlisle recited. I raised a brow as I realised he was studying the body for clues. It sometimes disgusted me, the fascination he held with the human body but I could deal more with the fascination of the vampiric body.

"Oh fuck this. I'll just check." I sighed as I knelt down next to him and went to touch the infant's skin.

"Wait! It might not be safe. We don't know what...she is." Carlisle frowned at me, holding my hand back.

"Well its not like she can kill me. Kinda already dead here." I snorted, pulling away from him a little to touch her forehead. It felt soft but cold like our kind tended to be.

_Its warm here. Like it._

_I'm so hungry. She has a pretty voice though._

_Its so tight in here, I can't move without hurting you. I'm sorry._

_I have to get out, now! Its too tight. It hurts._

_Why aren't you moving, mamma?_

_She has pretty hair. I like him, I want them to stay with me._

"She's...she was born? She killed her mother when it...happened." I turned to Carlisle with confusion clear on my face. Each memory was short and concise, she wasn't very good at organization but she didn't need to be considering the few memories she had were very much feeling related. It surprised me that she was even able to articulate in her thoughts as an infant. It almost gave me a headache to go through her thoughts one by one they were all in the same time span of around a month.

"Thats interesting. Any thing else?" He looked enthralled as he glanced between the child and me. I looked back to the baby girl with a furrowed brow.

"S-she likes you. Its all really jumbled up " I mumbled, shaking my head. I paused as she made some kind of high pitched noise and giggled, crawling towards me. I tensed and fell backwards away from her, expecting pain at this new object but instead she just felt soft. She smelled...pure and warm. I stared at her as she sat on my foot and felt the oddest feelings arise. I wanted to take her home but at the same time I didn't.

"What should we do?" Carlisle looked back at me. I frowned in thought. I was callous by nature of starting my life in the Volturi, in fact if I were still the same Lottie almost two years ago I'd have torn the infant to shreds. I wouldn't have even thought twice about it. But this was new. She wasn't a break in the law but almost a loophole. She looked and smelled like us but felt very much human. I didn't know something like her could exist.

"We can't leave her out here." I looked back to him, wondering what he'd say. He sighed as he nodded.

"I know. We'll take her back to the house and see if there's anything to be done, maybe even clean her up a little." He looked back to the child who smiled innocently back at him.

"What about Edward?" I queried as he took off his shirt and wrapped it about the infant. I was a little distracted by the view of his chest for a few seconds but quickly focused when he spoke.

"He has to learn to be around humans peacefully. Perhaps, this is a good starting point." He shrugged, holding a hand down to me.

"I suppose so." I sighed as I took his hand and pulled myself up, beginning to dust off my legs and skirt.

As we came out of the woods and into the open field that surrounded the house, I noticed Edward had gone inside. It was a little comforting but at the same time I realized we'd have to face him eventually. He'd probably feel just like I did at first, which was also worrying. Garrett had more control, his diet consisted of humans so he was entirely satisfied until he needed to feed again. We didn't ask questions about where he went for days at a time, just asked that he hunted out of our area.

"Well here we go." I mumbled as we walked up the porch's front steps. I opened the door for Carlisle with my one free hand and strolled into the living room first. Edward's eyes immediately zeroed in on me while Garrett's nose scrunched up.

"What in god's name is that smell?" Garrett asked incredulously as Carlisle walked in.

"Probably her." I motioned to the babby in his arms. Both Garrett and Edward hissed a little and back away.

"What the **hell** were you two thinking?! The Volturi'll have our heads on a spike!" Garrett bellowed motioning to the child. I shook my head.

"I said the same thing." I put my hands up in surrender.

"We didn't create her. Found her under a tree, you can hear her heartbeat." Carlisle exclaimed with an odd level of fascination in his voice.

"That can't be right." Garrett muttered after a second of silence. Carlisle handed me the child and immediately went to explaining how he knew she'd been born, what made her human...all the doctory things he enjoyed. He talked about how he could hear the blood running through her veins and how she'd been born instead of created, and what happened during the birth.

I felt a tug on my hair and looked down to the child to find her sticking a red curl into her mouth. I tsked at her as I pulled it out of her grasp and her spit. She seemed content to lay here in my arms and play with my hair, giggling every once in a while. I took a rather long red curl and brushed it lightly over her cheek. She grinned and let out a small giggle that brought a large smile to my face. Only Carlisle had been able to do that in the past.

"Lottie?" Garrett was calling my name.

"Yes?" I looked up from her and raised a brow.

"Um...Carlisle and I are going to go grab some...supplies." He shrugged, looking a little bewildered still. I have to admit. When we went out on the hunt, I was just expecting prey and sex and then home. Not...this. It was sudden and surprising.

I went upstairs to run water in the sink for her with Carlisle following me. Carlisle had a good amount of knowledge on the care of infants apparently, informing me of how to hold her, wash her, wrap the blanket around her, and what to do if she cried. He seemed excited as he went out the door with Garrett sauntering along behind him. I heard the car start up a minute later as they left.

"Can...can I hold her?" Edward asked softly from the couch. I pursed my lips as I thought about it. She was asleep in my arms after the bath, wrapped in a red blanket I'd found in the closet.

"Do you feel you can control yourself?" I raised a brow, checking. He nodded slowly. I gave a small smile as I gently shifted her to his arms.

"I think she's dreaming." He stared down at her with some amount of wonder.

"What's she dreaming about?" I asked curiously. I don't remember what it was like to have dreams as a human. Or what it was like to sleep as a human. Really all I had was the memory of killing Ralphie that was close to my human years. It wasn't one I enjoyed reliving. I would have been 40 years old soon since I was born in 1892, probably would've had grandkids by now. Instead I had Carlisle, Edward, Garrett, and this wee babby.

"She's dreaming about you." He looked away from the child to me. I pursed my lips as I slowly nodded. I heard a bell ring and looked over my knees to see Pluto rubbing against my shins. I picked him up as I stood and looked back to Edward.

"If you feel like you can control yourself, I'll go feed this guy." I raised a brow. This was essentially giving him a bit of a chance to make up for that girl's death in Chicago.

"Oh I can. She actually smells incredibly unappetizing." He nodded as I let a little smile slip onto my face.

"Funnily enough, that's what I thought." I snorted and turned to walk towards the kitchen.


	11. Chapter 11

Garret and Carlisle bickered over who could built what the fastest. Carlisle's task was to built the actual crib, wooden beams and nails and screws littered the office floor. We had one bedroom for Carlisle and I, one for Edward, and one for Garrett. That was all the bedrooms we had left in the house so it was either that she slept in our room or we redid the office space and moved Carlisle up to the attic.

"Are you two sure this is a good idea?" I asked warily as Carlisle motioned to the page of instructions and the parts lying around. I could see paint buckets, wallpaper supplies, curtains of various shades and lengths and bedding. It was a mess in there. They'd already set up a chair to feed her in when she got a little bigger.

"Oh it'll be fine. Don't you worry, missy." Garrett waved me off from the door way. All the office supplies had been moved to the attic already by the three men and now Edward hung around me and the babby. She was adorable to say the least but it'd been a week since we found her and no one had stepped forward for her but we were still worried someone would. So she went nameless. She was the babby, or the baby, or just it. Garrett called her an it to get a rise out of me.

"Lottie?" Edward called my name hesitantly from downstairs. I took them one at a time and raised a brow as I got to the bottom. Edward had a panicked look on his face, unsure and confused with what to do.

"Are you in control?" I rushed forwards with a bit of worry at his expression, looking between him and the baby he held over his shoulder. I think he was patting her back.

"I-I think she...vomited on my back." He spoke with disgust. I paused in my rush to get over there and just slowly grinned at him instead.

"Better your's than mine." I snorted as I took her from his extended arms.

"I'm just going to help them." He sighed with some disgust as he pulled off the sweater and went up the stairs. I re-wrapped the quilt blanket around her, pulling it a little tighter as I looked down at her. It was the oddest thing. The more time I spent around her, the more I wanted to keep her here. She'd been sleeping in mine or Carlisle's or Garrett's arms and if we were busy, she slept in mine and Carlisle's bed.

"What is it, sweetheart?" I asked as she tugged on my hair. I pulled it back out of her grasp as she waved her arms to the right of me. I looked up to see the sunlight streaming in and looked back down to her.

"You want to go outside?" I raised a brow as she seemed to nod. What an odd child, she seemed to comprehend the environment around her leading me to believe she was growing much faster than what I'd expected.

I went out the door and laid her down onto the grass either the blanket unwrapped. She rolled around a bit, glittering in the sun just like my shins did as I sat down on the edge of the porch. I could still hear the guys bickering over which part went where and the sounds of hammers being used. It sounded like they were arguing over which piece when where for the side of the crib.

I looked back as I heard the door open to see Edward sullenly coming out and collapsing next to me. He seemed downtrodden as he leaned down to put his head on his knees. I raised a brow, waiting for him to explain what was the matter when he just sighed some more. After the third sigh, I just said screw it and outright asked.

"Whats wrong?" I asked slowly, looking at him.

"They kicked me out. Said I should come back for the painting." He huffed. I snorted as I nodded.

"It's not like I'm awful at manual labor, I just haven't done much of it." He glowered at the ground.

"I'm sure its just that there's two of them working on it already." I rubbed his back awkwardly.

"Hey, how about we go look for clothes for her? Huh?" I thought about it as I looked over to see her naked arse up in the air. It was something he could be involved in which I felt like he was lacking right now. I still didn't think of him as a son but maybe more like a close friend that lived with us and was a few years younger.

"That'd be great." He gave me a crooked smile that I returned.

"Lovely, I'll go let them know and we'll be off." I patted him on the back and stood, stretching a little.

"Oh, and you should probably wrap her back up." I motioned to the girl as she rolled around, eating grass and maybe insects. She'd probably regret that when she was older, if she was still around us then. I skipped inside and went up the stairs, opening the door slightly.

"Whoa whoa! Close it!" Garrett yelled from the inside as Carlisle zipped through and shut it behind him.

"No peeking till it's finished." He admonished with a ghost of a smile. I raised a brow as I mirrored his expression but with a little more exasperation than I think he could possibly have.

"Well, Doctor Fix-it. We're going to go get her some clothes." I leaned a little closer to him, putting my hands over his biceps.

"Forgot that bit." He sighed, shaking his head.

"We all have to forget some things." I smiled as I pecked him softly on the lips and leaned back.

"We'll see about that Mrs. Cullen." He smirked as he pulled me forwards a tad and ran a line of kisses back up my neck to my lips.

I felt my toes curl at the sensation and almost grinded into him when I remembered we were in the hallway and Edward was waiting down stairs. Didn't want to scare the virgin boy into celibacy. We'd had close calls in the past but I don't think Edward had ever been graced with the full, real, sight of Carlisle or I in the nude.

"Maybe." I giggled as I pulled out of his grasp and turned to go down the stairs.

"Hey." He almost pouted as he pulled me back to his chest while his hands drifted.

"Hmm?" I raised a brow as he leaned down with hooded eyes on my lips.

He was soft at first, kissing me gently, but when I nipped at his lip it all sort of kicked up a notch. I slid a leg up his and he ended up with one hand on my ass while another had just traveled up my shirt. Mine weren't really in a better position with one twisted into his hair and the other pulled his face towards my own.

"Lottie! Seriously?" He growled a little, gripping me to his frame when Edward called out my name in a mixture of embarrassment and annoyance.

"Coming!" I yelled back. I felt a small smile drift over my face as he growled and pecked him on the lips.

"I expect to see you soon, love." He smirked, his head still incredibly close to mine.

"Hmmm, we'll see about that." I grinned and danced out of his grasp. I tucked my shirt back into the skirt as I went traveling down the stairs and skipped the last two.

"Let's go." I nodded towards the door as Edward carried the girl in one hand and her pram in the other.

"Do we really have to take that bloody thing?" I motioned to the pram with some distaste. It was a large square thing with metal and black fabric running along the outsides. There was two large wheels in the front and two smaller ones in the back. I wasn't that fond of it, it looked entirely ugly to me.

"I guess not." He shrugged as he dropped it on the spot and walked past me out to the car. I followed after with a small smile on my face at his grace in dropping the pram.

Edward in a women's and children's clothing store was almost a show to see with your friends. He stood there with the child in his arms, looking a little lost and confused as women came up and cooed at him. Sometimes they'd ask if she was his or where her mother was, when that happened he'd go almost mute and point at me. He was asked twice what her name was and told them that we were still coming up with it. I ended up holding her while he went off and found a multitude of shoes in various sizes.

"What's her name? Shes a darling little thing." A delicate voice asked next to me, causing me to turn and look at the speaker. She was beautiful for a human with pale skin, blue eyes, and golden hair. Her eyes were a striking shade of blue, it was almost violet looking as she smiled at me.

"She's not quite got a name just yet. I'm Lottie Cullen." I smiled back at the woman who seemed to be immediately taken with my little girl, she looked almost longing as she took me in.

"Rosalie Hale." She smiled back, nodding at me.

"Would you like to hold her? Be warned, she loves to vomit on people's backs." I snorted the last bit with a little smirk. I stretched the child out to her with the same smirk that turned into a smile as her face brightened up almost automatically.

"Oh! I'd love too. Is her daddy around here?" She took the wee thing with a giddy look on her face. I went to shake my head when an arm snaked around my waist. I had a bit of fury in my eyes as I turned around to tell off whoever the hell just decided to touch me. I looked back to see amused ochre eyes and blonde hair and shut my mouth almost immediately, relaxing into his touch.

"He is." He smiled down at me as he kissed the top of my head.

"Carlisle Cullen." He looked back to Miss Hale with a nod to introduce himself. I could only assume that after the first hour Garrett and he had finished the room.

"Rosalie Hale, your girl's just absolutely darling." She smiled, looking happy as she cooed back at the babby girl in her arms.

"She can be a handful." Edward appeared next to us holding more miniature clothes in his hands.

"Edward, this is Miss Rosalie Hale." Carlisle introduced the boy who seemed to be interested in Miss Hale. I gave him a meaningful look to keep his hands and his teeth to himself. We didn't need another reason to high tail it out of town for a bloody murder.

"How old is she?" She looked up smiling at me. I pursed my lips, had absolutely no clue.

"Close to 2 months." Carlisle answered smoothly. Well...thank god no one had asked me that when he wasn't around.

"Oh, I should be going. My friend has finally arrived." She looked a little sad as she looked back at us. She extended her arms, Carlisle moved first taking the girl out of her arms.

"Lovely meeting you." I nodded to her.

"You as well. You have a beautiful family." She smiled back at me, looking a little longing and melancholic as she took in our odd little family. I thought that was the last we'd see of Miss Rosalie Hale. Edward later informed us on the way home that she was a socialite of sorts, new money and very much popular with the men around this town.

I was more excited to see the nursery that Garrett and my husband had put together than anything else really. Carlisle would have to run off soon to go to another job opening. We were hopeful for this one, it was a understaffed hospital and these days it seemed anyone would do.

"Ready?" He had his hands just over my eyes, not quite touching but I couldn't see anything past them.

"Yes!" I tsked with a little bit of a grin as I heard the door open in front of me. I wanted to see the stupid room already, goodness. We took a few steps forwards until I felt carpet under my feet and Carlisle pulled his hands away from my eyes to rest on my hips.

There looked to be cherry blossoms painted all over the walls coming from a single tree in the corner next to the room's brick fireplace. Pink curtains covered the two windows and a red rug covered the hardwood floor in front of a rocking chair, a dark wood crib, and a few bookcases. Odd little nursery rhyme posters covered parts of the open walls. Overall I loved it all.

"Its wonderful. You two did a perfect job." I complimented as I felt a smile spread over my face.


	12. Chapter 12

"Lottie?" Carlisle's voice beckoned me a little closer from upstairs. I put down the bowl of odd smelling banana mush in my hands onto the counter and went up the stairs to see Carlisle frowning down at Emmaline.

We'd named her that after no one showed up at our door step looking for the child after 3 months. Carlisle said her growth rate seemed to be double that of a human. At 3 months she looked like what a 6 month human child did, I was trying to distance myself from the child out of fear that she'd die with half the lifespan of a human. It'd be only 15-20 years with her and I wanted so much more.

"What is it?" I grabbed Pluto up from around my ankles as I went up the stairs. It was much easier to just carry the cat than it was to let him trail around my feet 24-7.

"She's...apparently got your hair?" He looked back at me with a bit of confusion and wariness. I furrowed my brow as I took a few steps closer to look at the sleeping infant.

"Shit. You're right." I was a little gobsmacked as I stared down at the child's flaming red hair. That was definitely something that had just come around in the past few days. We'd seen wisps but it seemed that she now had _actual_ hair. I'd only ever remember Ralph's mother having hair that shade outside of me.

"Edward! Come have a look at this." I called for what considered himself to Carlisle and I's other child. It felt odd thinking of him that way, I felt more like he was a nice flatmate here but Carlisle welcomed the thoughts.

"You do realise that I can just see what you see in your head right?" He checked as he opened the door. Emmie was a deep sleeper we'd noticed. At one point she'd had Pluto sitting on her face and somehow the child never batted an eye, just kept on sleepin'. Slept like a rock, that one.

"It's not the same as seeing the real thing, Lady-Muck." I teased with a small smile as he leaned over the railing to look at the babby. I thought about calling Garrett over but recalled he'd left a week or two prior to Carlisle finally getting a job in the hospital in town. It'd been sad, sad for me anyways.

I missed Garrett's presence during the days more so than at night. When Carlisle had finally gotten his job, he was never home during the day so it left me with a moody teenager, a needy cat, and a baby to deal with.

"Interesting. She's dreaming." He tilted his head, running a finger down her cheek. I pursed my lips before curiosity got the best of me and I touched her skin.

_"Ralph!" It's warm in here but I can barely hear him yelling back at her now. Momma sounds upset, I don't like her upset._

_I remembered this scene, Momma wasn't moving anymore and I couldn't find anyone else so I waited with her. "Kill it!" I don't want to die. This women looked pretty but she was scared. Why was she scared?_

_"We have to kill her." I knew what kill meant. He was taking steps closer to me, his teeth polished. This isn't how it went, why-_

"Love?" I was startled, stiffening as Carlisle's hand ran over my shoulders. I blinked a few times, looking at him as I realigned myself with reality. He was concerned, reaching to place his hand on my jaw when I turned back around to face Emmie. She was crying. Something tugged in my chest forcing me to lean down and hold her against my front. I started to lightly shake her, trying to wake her up.

She awoke with a start looking terrified, Carlisle's hand drifted towards her which seemed to only scare her more. I didn't realise it until after that she'd bitten me, two tiny shark canines dug into my shoulder making me freeze. I could practically feel the venom being pumping into my system, burning everything in it's path.

This was a new discovery to add to the list. Despite the fact that she looked like us, her skin tore much more easily and apparently her venom was quite strong. When I did finally realise that she'd bitten me, Carlisle had already pulled her away and handed her to Edward in a short growl.

"Lottie?" Carlisle's worry pushed through the burn. It seemed his protective instincts won out over the fatherly bond he'd build with her. I honestly hadn't expected that so it was quite the surprise all around

"Holy feck." The words felt garbled in my ears but I still recognized it as my own. Carlisle's head disappeared from my view before I felt cold lips fall on her bite. The sting seemed to dissipate as I realised he was literally sucking the venom out of my wound.

"Does it still hurt? Did that help? Is there more?" I stared at him for a tick as his questions were fired rapidly, his hand grasped the corner of my jaw tightly.

"Love, you need to talk to me." He was worried but I didn't quite get why outside of the bond we were connected through.

"It feels better actually." I responded after another second had passed. He blew out a bit of air as he leaned his forehead over mine, pulling me closer to him and inhaling.

"What just happened?" He sounded exasperated as I looked around to find Edward and Emmaline were gone. A streak of panic flew over my mind when the thought crossed my mind that she was out of my sight.

"Where is she?" My eyes darted back to Carlisle as he frowned at me, pulling back slightly. He was thinking about something, analysing it and turning it over in his head for meaning. I'd seen him do the same thing with the odd books or a song he felt particularly connected to. The last song had been Bach's Cello Suite No.1 in G, we'd gone to see it as a date away from home. It was also a test to see how long Edward could be left alone under Garrett's eye.

"She's perfectly fine. Edward took her out of the room after I pulled her teeth out of your shoulder." His tone was guarded as he watched me still.

"She didn't _mean_ to do it. Shes a child. Ho-" I began to defend her as he held up a hand.

"She's a dangerous child." He finished plainly as I scoffed.

"Shes a _child,_ Carlisle! She just had a bloody nightmare." I threw up my hands, beginning to feel a slight tantrum start.

"And? She'll always have nightmares. She sleeps. She'll always have to sleep. That doesn't mean she can snap at her mother every time she does, and she's growing. What happens when shes twice this size and I'm not here?" His voice was stern enough to force me into silence while I pursed my lips angrily.

"Edward's here." My chin went up ever so slightly in a defiant position as I dared him to argue with that.

"We don't know what that will do to you if it's left in there for too long. In fact we don't know _anything_ about what she could hurt you with." I felt my eyes roll so hard, they could possibly fall out the other side of my head until he held up a finger again.

"I'm not saying it was on purpose, Lottie. We both know it wasn't, but she can't be allowed to think its okay." He continued, looking at me expectantly for a aye or nay to his statement. I pursed my lips as I realised he was just trying to have me co-parent with him.

"Alright." I nodded, letting out a sigh. He seemed to be a little relieved as he pulled me towards him again and pressed a small, chaste kiss to my forehead.

"Good. I didn't enjoy that." He hugged me a little tighter before letting go and taking my hand to pull me out towards Edward and Emmie.


	13. Chapter 13

Carlisle relaxed a little more around Emmie as she got older. It was really only a year later, when he brought home a man I hadn't met before that I felt those odd protective instincts blossom out of my chest like they had when she'd snapped at me and disappeared from my sight but stronger this time. I wanted to shield her from the blonde man with red eyes.

"This is my wife, Lottie." Carlisle introduced me smoothly with warmth in his voice. This was a friend of his then but now I was wondering how on earth they met? Especially all the way in the city.

"Alistair. I believe I've already heard of her. " He bowed his head to me quickly as I reciprocated the action.

"Oh?" I raised a brow as I watched him stand in the door way from my position on the couch. He was a brooder it seemed from his expressions.

"Your trickery of the mind is infamous among us all." He smirked in what seemed to be a forced fashion. He looked almost frightened of me, dare I say.

His head jerked to the side, startled, as I heard the light pitter-patter of Emmie's bare feet hitting the floors. It sounded like Edward and her were back from the market. I'd begun to place more responsibilities on him as he seemed to work on his control and buying her food and clothes was one of them. We'd talked about schooling but it was difficult to place her in school when she'd grow twice as fast as any of the others.

"And this is Edward and Emmaline." Carlisle introduced the rest of the family slowly as the little redheaded girl came around first, running up to me. She did remind me more and more of Ralph's mother with the way her hair was curly and unruly. Mine was the same but I'd always kept it in a braid of some kind.

"Look, look." She was excited about a book she'd gotten it seemed. She was waving it around at me in one hand while she climbed over the couch to my lap, pushing Pluto out of her way as she went. We'd had constant talks about her being gentle with the animal but after it'd scratched her, she was less pushy as she once had been.

"Carlisle..." Alistair sounded genuinely terrified as he looked away from me and Emmaline to his companion. "You know better than to create an immortal child." He was backing around from Emmaline who seemed to have just now noticed that he was standing there.

"She's not. She's mostly human." I declared quickly. I held the child to my chest, regarding him with heavy eyes full of suspicion. It felt unreal, the threat I thought this man somehow posed to a girl whose bite could knock me onto my arse.

He looked back to Carlisle as though he didn't quite believe me. "You have to truly listen." Carlisle nodded slowly in response to his expression as he explained just _how_ she was human. Alistair's mouth fell open as he looked back to us on the couch.

"The child...she. She has a heart beat?" Alistair tilted his head as he came closer, moving to touch her. I twisted her away from his reach without being really all that sure as to _why_ I thought this man was such a threat. His hand faltered, touching the exposed skin on my forearm and pushing me into his head all the way into his human past.

_Why were we traveling such a distance? Father said we would only be going to see the council and I don't recall this as the way to the castle. I know I must preform my duty as heir but...I really don't want too. Why couldn't William have lived instead of me? I want to hunt and fish, not do this bloody aristocrat thing._

_"I'm going to put him on the throne of England. He'll be the next Charlemagne!" Father was proud as he informed the council, all clapped with praise in their jewelry and silks. This was his plan to over throw Edward II? Truly? I would make a poor king._

_"But how?" One asked from the far right of the wooden table. Fools. They were all just fools. I looked back as my father seemed to let out a sigh._

_"I was forced to sell my soul to make Alistair invincible." Everyone in the room seemed to have believed the baron, but I knew now that my father had gone mad in that moment._

_I was sitting near the fire when I first heard knock on the front door. A man appeared, addressed as_ _Astaroth, by my father and the servants. He was left alone with me now. He felt unruly and dangerous. " You may be king, if you truly want to be." He stood in front of me, so close to the fire and yet it seemed to not affect him._

_"And?" I raised a brow and waited for his reply. This was not what I truly wanted but I had to do it for it was my father's wish. How could I tell this stranger that? I would ruin the family honour._

_"Then I promise you power and a legion of your own men. But...all I ask in return is that you simply stay out of the sun and avoid drawing too much attention." His smile was eerie as I blinked and found his teeth had dug themselves into my shoulder._

_Father should have known better. How could he have done this to me? What am I even anymore? A demon? They were only peasants and I killed them all in cold blood and my sister and mother were sold off to this Asaroth. I'm a fiend. A convict. How could he have done this to me? I have to leave but first I'm going to kill him. He'll pay for what he's done to me and his own wife and daughter with his life._

"What have you done, witch?" Alistair was angry but hurt as he snatched his hand away from me, darting back to the door way.

I pursed my lips as I tried to force it all out, to reconnect myself with the present. His memories were particularly potent with fear and anger that connected themselves with my own terror and hatred in my earlier years. Carlisle's word kept ringing in my mind, that I was more than that. I was more than the hatred and the pain and the fear. I could be _more_. I could help people. Carlisle took that my moment of silence and jumped in with his words of wisdom.

"She simply read through your memories, Alistair. Nothing more than her gift, there is no witchcraft in my home _or_ in my wife." Carlisle's tone was more strained but still polite. He didn't appear to appreciate the term 'witch'.

I suppose it stemmed from his early vampire hunting childhood and a rather religious childhood. I had religion in my own childhood but it was more muted than in his. I wasn't actively hunting demons of the night or anything of the sort, instead I was expected to follow religious laws and customs...Didn't quite work out for me considering Ralphie and all.

"Of course." He breathed raggedly, taking several steps away from the child and I with speed. "I-I must go. My congratulations to you and your wife, Carlisle." He bowed his head to me and then Carlisle who returned his gesture. I watched with some confusion as he just simply disappeared from sight and waited a second or two.

"Another friend of yours?" I raised a brow, taking the book Emmie had been constantly waving around for my attention. It's cover was minimalist, white with three girls and a ring of children's toys surrounding them in the center.

"I met him in England. Hes actually doing much better than he had been." Carlisle replied lowly. I nodded absentmindedly to him.

"He didn't like that little run through his past." Edward commented. I ran my finger along the red bow at the bottom with mild curiosity at the texture under my fingers. It was real red velvet, it appeared to be adherred to the book, Ballet Shoes by a Noel Streatfeild.

"I imagine not." I kissed Emmie's forehead as a reminder of the things that I could do to better myself than hurt people any more. "He was angry, and scared for most of his life." I smiled down at her as she grinned back at me, the size of a two year old now.

* * *

"Yes, good job. Now we just put it in his bowl." I smiled at Emmie as she held the knife we'd used to open a can of meat for the cat up to Carlisle, proudly. The can wasn't used in Em's meal, she'd had chicken and rice instead but the cat needed more meat than she did according to Carlisle.

He gave her a smile then went back to glancing at my arse and his paper. I knew he'd do a double take every time I bent at the waist to talk to her because Edward kept groaning and just left the room, turning on a record of his on his gramophone.

This time it was one by Verdi, I believe it was _La traviata_. We had discussed getting him a piano to practice on but with the war gaining speed things were even tighter than before so he relied on staying out of the sight of any recruiters and listening to his records.

"Right!" She nodded quickly, speed walking over to the cat's glass bowl where he sat yowling to himself. She dumped the can roughly and took a step back, waiting for him to go ahead and start eating. The cat seemed suspicious, sniffing it for a second before walking around it and finally taking a bite out of the bowl and away from Emmie.

I went to sit down at the table only to change my mind and collapse into Carlisle's lap, gaining his attention entirely. He pecked my forehead softly before moving his paper around for us both to read it. It was more news of the war making me frown, I didn't like this talk of a World War after the first. I'd been absent from the first, hiding and skulking in the cavernous halls of the Volturi.

"Theres talk about a draft being put into use if the Germans gain speed. We might even join the war, love." He seemed to sigh, laying a hand over my thigh.

"We'll need to avoid the draft." I sighed, reading through the headlines. _Hitler's "Lets be friends" Plea to the World_ was on the first page while the second delved off onto something about the unions backing a politician, _150 Unions back DeLancy for Council._ Boring.

"Mm. I think it's best we stay out of the towns when it begins. Hold out until it's all over. " He nodded, agreeing with me.

* * *

The war waged on and on, gaining speed in the US's newspapers with Hitler's horrifying exploits concerning Austria and Roosevelt trying to seek peace with him. It felt like the world had gone to hell in a hand basket right around us.

I spent most of my time with Edward and Emmie, teaching them both about the world the best I could. I was just starting to feel constricted when we went out to buy her some varying sizes of shoes in case the war really did involve us like Carlisle suspected. She was the size of a normal four year old but acted closer to eight.

"Lottie..." Edward's face twisted into confusion and uncomfortable expressions as he grabbed Emmie from going any closer towards the house.

"What?" I raised a brow, feeling panic sneak up. Had something happened to Carlisle? The cat? Pluto had another good 5 years _at least_.

"You'll...you'll have to talk to Carlisle but its for the best that she stays out here. Shes more like the humans than like us." Edward explained, motioning to the child dangling confusedly from his arms. The panic built into terror as the worst entered my mind, Carlisle was dead. He was killed for some odd reason, gone from me forever. I raced towards the house, pushing the door open in a daze. Instead of seeing my mate dead, I saw a blonde girl's blood dripping onto our couch and Carlisle pacing. Oh for feck's sake.


	14. Chapter 14

"Are we running a bloody _home_ now?" I threw my hands up as I came to a full stop inside the door way. Carlisle's face twisted with compassion and a certain amount of sympathy. Both were emotions I tended to forget about.

"I couldn't leave her there. She was practically dead when I got there, Lottie. I had to make a quick decision." He reasoned, motioning to the girl on our couch that had begun to feel the changes of our venom already. Tears creeped down her cheeks, smearing what little make up she had left.

"Did you even think about Emma? At all?" I motioned towards the back door, looking out past the windows at Edward and Emmie.

"She can learn control. You learned." Carlisle debated, he wasn't moving from this. This girl had essentially grown on him in the few hours she'd been here. Lovely.

"What if she doesn't _want_ too?" I hissed. This was just irritating me more and more.

"We can't tell until she's awake, you care more about an infant that _attacked_ you than a girl that wasn't any better off than you were when I found you in Italy." Carlisle's distress quickly turned into frustration at my lack of compassion. It'd been pushed out of me with Emmie and Carlisle being the only ones with the ability to drag it all out of me again.

"Edward could find his mate in her! Don't you want his happiness as well?" Bartering, Carlisle had me finally submit. I guess we wouldn't throw the girl out after all. Great.

"Fine! We'll see just **great** this'll turn out then, shall we?" I actually stomped my feet as I shouted this across her screams at him. He seemed frustrated still as he pressed his lips into a thin line, not saying anything more.

* * *

I kept a close eye on the girl, sitting close to her for each of the 3 days it took for her humanity to leave her. I was careful to not touch her but also felt the curiousity roam. I believe I'd been reading the remains of Carlisle's newspaper, checking in on the situation with Hitler and his plans, when she awoke.

"W-what's going on?" She sounded unsure but angry. I lowered the paper a smidge, careful not to disturb the aged cat on my lap just to look at this girl.

"You're in mine and my husband's home. You were attacked, Miss...?" I raised a brow, trailing off as a queue for her to speak up.

"Hale. I _know_ I was attacked but what's going on? Why am I not home by now?" Her tone turned snippy after answering my question, like she'd expected me to do something more about the situation she was in. I folded the newspaper down in my hands as I collected myself. I wanted very little to do with her in the first place, like hell was I going to turn into the maid of some prissy bitch.

"Well Miss _Hale_. Take a look around, go to the mirror." I motioned towards the brass mirror on the side of the house to find her zoom past me for it. She stared at herself for a few moments, looking rather pleased.

"You're a vampire, Miss. There is no going home anymore. You'll kill your family." I sighed, watching her appraise herself some more. She glanced at me in the mirror and laughed a little.

"Look, I'm not sure what you've done to me but I like it. _But_ I still need to go back home. I have some...unfinished business." I was little taken aback at the malice seeping into her words. Good god. We've turned a female serial killer, I didn't even know those existed.

"Well Look, honey. You're not going anywhere for at least a year. I'm not having the Volturi come down on my head for you losing control." I snorted, ignoring her statements. "If anything, I'd rather tear you apart and burn you myself. I've simply got too much to lose." Shaking my head at her, she turned back around, frowning.

"You don't understand." I stared blankly at her, not entirely interesting in understanding. She apparently took that as a sign to come closer to me, knocking into the couch as she did so. It finally fell apart after years of Emmie and Edward bumping and gouging the crap out of it.

"Uh. I'm sorry, I'll pay to have that fixed." She apologised mutely as we both took in the splintered side of what was once my favourite sofa.

"It's fine. It was about time we replaced it anyways, it's been here since maybe...1925? I think?" I shrugged, keeping a loose hold on Pluto in my lap.

"Goodness, you had a couch for _13_ _years_?" She asked incredulously. I stared at her like she was an absolutely idiot until I realised she'd come from the upper class. A group that didn't keep anything for more than a year.

"Obviously." I deadpanned.

"Well. I'll be going now so, thanks for everything." She gritted her teeth in an odd smile as I sighed and moved Pluto off my lap. There was an easy way to do this.

"Come here." I waved her over, she came closer hesitantly. I pressed my lips together as I almost felt pity for her with my hand out. "I'm sorry." With that I gripped her forearm, pushing us both back into what she'd seemed to have forgotten and what I wanted to show her.

_I stood next to Miss Hale, my hand grasped her arm until I felt there was no longer a reason too. It was night time here, also rather wet. I could see the cobble stone roads as Miss Hale began crossing the street, five men were under a streetlight, drunk._

_ "What is this?"  _ _Miss Hale sounded a little terrified as she whispered into my ear._

_ "It's the night you died."  _ _I responded astutely, looking away from her to see the past her, trying to avoid the group of men._

_"What?" I felt a tinge bad for how coldly I'd thrown her into the past but I was so used to this. So used to simply sticking my head into other's minds and pulling out whatever I needed too to live on from whatever horror's they'd survived. Each trip took something out of me and this time, I felt it was going to be quite a chunk._

_"ROSE! We're been waiting for you!" I watched the sleaziest of the men shout at the girl, I suppose her name was Rose then. She relaxed a little, walking over to them as Rose's arm under my grip tensed. She did remember._

_"Royce, you're drunk." Rose seemed irritated with him, not quite afraid yet._

_ "Walk away. Walk away..." _ _I could hear Rose whispering under her breath as she watched her past self and choose to link our elbows together._

_"Isn't she lovely John?" Royce seemed to not even hear her speak to him, instead he leered towards her in a gloat to his friend. "Told you she was a looker."_

_"Hard to say with all those clothes on." John leered as well. I swallowed hard, knowing where this was all about to go._

_"Show him what you look like, Rose. Take a few layers off." Royce seemed to try and command her for his buddies, Rose simply seemed to try and leave. But. It was far too late. She was going to die. I know how this memory would play out and the girl standing next to me, did too._

_"You can cover your eyes. We can't leave until it's over."_ _I explained, trying to ease the pain I'd put her through simply by doing this. I didn't realise it until it was too late that she'd been raped. Guilt began to flutter in my stomach and crushed my chest._

_"I'll see you tomorrow, Royce." She started to walk away but Royce yanked her hat off abruptly, pulling out the pins and her hair..._

_"You'll do as I say." Royce's sadistic pleasures began to shine through as her coat was yanked off of her then her dress was torn. I saw her turn away for a second as I stared on. I would always stare on, I didn't have it in me to walk away and not look. She fought, she truly did. She'd scratched up his face by the time he'd gotten her again._

_It seemed like it'd lasted for a life time, the turns they all took with her body. Each one shaved off another second of her life from her hands and legs until she was finally almost gone and they'd left. Left her there. She'd begun to cry now, onto my shoulder, shaking me a tad._

_ "Rose? Look at me." _ _I turned towards her, ignoring the time slipping out of her hands before Carlisle would see her. She looked up at me with venomous tears slipping out and rolling down her cheeks._

_"We are made of Iron and Steel. You rust, but you endure. You are strong."_ _I recounted the words my own mother had said to me years and years ago. The only words I remembered. I looked back as Carlisle hesitantly sunk his teeth into her wrist, choosing to pick her up ever so gently and carry her towards our home. She understood now. She understood it all, I'd finally communicated that things truly had changed and so, we'd faded into the peach coloured living room again._

It was always a little dizzying to be pulled back into the present. This time, especially as it'd been a complete memory we'd stood there and watched. I looked out the window shakily and found the sun was starting to set, Carlisle would be home soon.

"I'm going to kill him." I looked back at her, shaking as she stood in my dress. I pursed my lips for a second, pondering how to respond. I could easily ask Edward to help me stop her but...I felt like she was justified. She should have her justice if she could, and it seemed she could.

"Don't come back here if you fall prey to the blood lust." I warned, nodding towards her statement.

"Blood lust?" She raised a brow, looking at me with mild curiosity.

"That burning in your throat? Its the need to feed on the humans. We don't do that here. Doesn't go over well with the locals." I smirked at that, imagining a 1600's style mob to run Dracula out of town.

"I don't want his blood, it might as well be disease." She grounded out, turning towards the car as it pulled in outside.

"Carlisle's home." I sighed, this was going to be a battle...unless..."I'd leave now if you still want to do it. He's a pacifist. Doesn't enjoy the death and dismay." I nodded towards my husband as he came out of the in a hurry. She nodded and did the oddest thing I thought possible. She came closer and closer until she finally just hugged me so tightly I thought she'd pop off my head, it pushed me back into her head of the last few seconds that just played out.

_He's going to die, screaming and crying. I won't show him mercy._

_"Blood lust?" My voice still threw me a little, it was even more beautiful sounding that her's. I was almost jealous of the auburn hair and freckled pale skin. She was beautiful in her own rite, a peaceful sort. I don't know if I'll ever find peace now._

_"That burning in your throat? It's the need to feed on the humans. We don't do that here. Doesn't go over well with the locals." She explained, with a small evil looking smile. It sounded like she'd been cracking a joke I just didn't understand. But now that she'd mentioned it. It does burn. I didn't think she was serious about everything but...everything's so bright and breathtaking...and I haven't actually been breathing..._

"Thank you." She murmured the words into my ear, bringing me back yet again. This was almost annoying at this point.

"Don't mention it." I patted her awkwardly on the back, unsure of how to deal with the contact.


End file.
